It's not as insane as you think
by Kawaii Bishyness
Summary: College!AU: As Nikolai is about to be shipped off to an island due to his special powers, Kristian swoops in with his batty eyes and even battier personality and thus changes his university life for better or worse (but mostly worse).
1. The Best Romance Happens in Cars

**Title: **It's not as insane as you think

_Edit: July 30, 2013_

* * *

"I'm _fine,_ mom."

"You see faeries."

"And trolls."

"And trolls. But I don't see how this is related."

"Trolls are cool."

"You're in college, Nikolai."

"Your point?"

"Just… try to get a grip on reality."

"Mooooom."

"Why don't you go take your car for a spin, and we'll talk about this later."

"Moooooom."

"Why are you so whiney?" She shoved Nikolai out the door, looking extremely agitated. He barely had any time to grab his car keys before he was out of the house, the door slammed behind him. Nikolai sighed and ran his fingers through his pale blond hair, staring at the cracked staircase with distaste. When his mother got into one of _those moods _(a.k.a. the times when she detested Nikolai's magical, beautiful talent of seeing the supernatural), she would threaten to disown him and make him pay for his college tuition. Usually, the arguments would smooth over once Nikolai promised to do the chores around the house, but this time she had just stared at him petulantly until he shut up and listened to her rant.

Well. No point in arguing now. He went down the apartment steps, almost tripping over the tenth step. There had been an urban myth floating around in his apartment complex about a girl who cursed the _tenth step of the tenth building, _but he had merely dismissed it as a silly tall tale, something that his friend Arthur would most likely come up with to try and scare him. He glared at it, but the white step looked back at him innocently.

He finally reached his beat-up Toyota, the washed-out white paint chipping away at an alarming pace. It had a dent on one side because of that one time Mathias was drunk as hell, jacked his car, and ran into a telephone pole.

Needless to say, Nikolai had not been pleased.

He turned on the car and slid into his seat. He let his forehead rest on the steering wheel for a while, thinking about how horribly mistreated he was when a shuffling sound on the shotgun seat almost scared the crap out of him.

"Hey."

Nikolai turned his head to the passenger seat, almost not daring to look. His mouth fell open.

Next to him was an unnaturally silver-haired boy, like someone had dumped stardust over his head and washed it out with white gold. He looked a little younger than him, and his deceptively calm expression had a touch of amusement, if the little quirk on his lip indicated anything. His violet eyes inspected him, and he was buckled down safely with a seatbelt.

The first thing Nikolai did was jump on him.

"You…" Nikolai rasped, his face close to the other's face. The bright purple eyes widened in surprise. "How the fuck did you get in here?"

"Your window was open." He gestured to the open window at the back. Nikolai followed his gaze, and sure enough, it was open.

Except for the fact that it was a 'broken' kind of window now.

"You… broke in." This wasn't a question. It was a statement.

"Well, actually, I was hiding underneath your car." He explained in an infuriatingly calm manner, as though it was normal for some stranger to break into cars. "This crazy girl called Michelle was following me. So yeah. Also, there was a metal tube pipe thing under there, so I used it."

"To smash my car window open."

"Not exactly."

"…" Norway stared at him. He stared back. There was a very uncomfortably long staring contest afterwards before the younger boy cleared his throat, his fingers splayed across Nikolai's chest.

"Now, would you please stop straddling me, or else I'll yell rape." Nikolai blinked, and realized, with an inward groan, that he was straddling the other.

_Great, _Nikolai thought warily. _My mother thinks I need therapy and some little kid is threatening to tell the cops that I'm a sexual offender. _

"I could call the police and have you arrested." Nikolai said.

"Right back at you." The other retorted.

They came to a mutual understanding. Nikolai got off from him, glancing at him every now and then. The boy fluffed up his hair, making him resemble a makeup powder-puff.

"You… how old are you?" Nikolai asked.

"How old do I LOOK like?" He raised his eyebrow, as if challenging him to say anything deprecating.

"You act like you're 7, but I'll go with 16." Nikolai responded. He got a punch on his shoulder which actually kind of hurt.

"I'm 18." He huffed childishly. Nikolai resisted the urge to laugh. "The name's Kristian."

"Kristian." Nikolai repeated. "As in 'I'm-oh-so-religious-God-is-everything'?"

"No." Kristian replied. "As in 'I'm-going-to-kick-your-ass-if-you-ever-say-that-a gain'."

"How do you spell it?" Nikolai asked.

"With a K." Kristian replied.

"What kind of name is that?" Nikolai said. Kristian looked extremely offended, swatting Nikolai's arm with his gloved hands.

"A special kind of name. So what's your name?" Kristian asked.

Nikolai contemplated on whether or not he should give a psycho kid his real name, but after a few seconds of mulling over it, he reached the very enlightening thought of _whatever. _"Nikolai."

"Sounds girly." Nikolai punched his arm, albeit lightly.

"Fuck you." Nikolai said emotionlessly.

"Ooh, don't threaten me with a good time." Kristian whistled. Nikolai groaned, already regretting talking to the younger.

"Just get the fuck out of my car." Nikolai unbuckled Kristian's seatbelt. Kristian's eyes widened, and he started to protest loudly.

"No! What if the crazy bitch comes back again! I don't like it when I get my picture taken, you know!" Kristian shouted. Nikolai pushed him out from the car, and slammed the car door shut.

"Don't come back again!" Nikolai called out before backing the car out of the driveway. Kristian sent a murderous gaze (or as murderous as a flat, emotionless expression could conjure) before nervously looking around, resembling a secret agent on a mission. When he figured that it was all clear, he started to walk leisurely to... somewhere.

"KRISTIANNNNN!" A tanned looking girl, her hair in pigtails, jumped out from a bush. "I LOVE YOU! MARRY ME!" Kristian paled considerably.

"NO!" He yelled, starting to run. The girl (probably Michelle) raised her blue dress and started to chase after him. Nikolai watched this happen in amusement before cranking up the radio and going the opposite direction.

* * *

There wasn't any particular destination he had in mind. Nikolai just didn't know what to do. Apparently, seeing faeries and trolls were a bad thing._ Mere hallucinations!_ His mother always chided him, asking why he wasn't like the other kids. God... he was perfectly fine. Gifted, of course, but misunderstood. Geniuses were always misunderstood. Like Einstein.

After circling his city about twenty times (the police had started to chase after him... they also gave him a ticket, for some reason) he decided to just go home. What else was there to do? Maybe he should just move out. Yes! Into the mountains, with all of the nisses and faes, circling around him as he went and hunted...

He parked his car in the open space, got out of the car, and bumped the door closed with his hip, swinging the car keys around his pointer finger. He walked up the steps, tripped over the tenth step (perhaps the urban myth wasn't such a myth after all?), and caught his balance right before he landed on a pile of bird shit. God, this seriously wasn't his day. He sighed, jammed the key into the door, and walked in.

"Nikolai!" His mother exclaimed. Before Nikolai could rant to his mom about how shitty his life was, his mother continued on. "I didn't know you had such a pretty friend!"

"...what?" Nikolai said, bemused.

"You know! The pretty guy! Man, he was so nice too!" She gushed on. Her hands waved wildly in the air, making her silver bangles clank against each other.

"Pretty guy?" Nikolai looked at his mother. SHE was the one going crazy, not him. "I don't have any friends... who are... pretty."

Which was true. Mathias was more of a chick-magnet-toned muscles, spiky hair, million dollar smile- which Nikolai was just stating as a fact. Tino was cute... he supposed. Looked more like a girl than a guy. He also had a scary-ass looking boyfriend called Berwald, who would beat anyone up if they hurt Tino. But Berwald was cool. He was awesome at the XBox and PS3. Or any game, seriously. Arthur was... handsome... probably. Mussed up strawberry blonde hair, who had a very sexy British accent.

Of course, he would _die _before he admitted that he found his fellow occult club member's accent _attractive _in any way.

He also had another list of friends to go through- which was weird, actually, since he wasn't exactly Mr. Popular. But he had a handful of friends who he actually enjoyed hanging out with, and his posse would differ from day-to-day depending on his schedule.

But _pretty boys? _He couldn't remember the last time he had found a member of his clique pretty.

"Where's this guy?" Nikolai asked, intent on cracking the mystery. His mom pointed at a vague direction, her manicured nails gleaming under the artificial light.

"Watching TV." She said cheerfully. "I can't believe you have a normal friend!" She wiped a single tear away from her face, staring off into the distance very dramatically. "My baby has grown! GROWN!"

"Uh, right." Nikolai edged towards the living room, trying to ignore his drama queen mother. "While you're crying, I'll go check up on my... friend..." She wiped her eyes daintily with a lace handkerchief and waved him off happily. Nikolai would've thought that he had been accepted into Harvard or something with the proud expression on her face.

Nikolai peered in and found -_oh dear lord, please be a hallucination, please-_ Kristian, his legs curled underneath him, watching the television screen intently. Shouts and gun shots were heard.

"Why the FUCK are you in my house?" Nikolai said, his voice sounding flat. "How'd you even get in?"

Kristian turned around, and his eyes panicked for a second, as though he hadn't planned on a confrontation so soon. It immediately cleared up afterwards.

"Uh. Through the TV screen, of course." Kristian waved his hand towards the TV. "I mean, my TV isn't hooked up yet, and I need to watch Criminal Minds SOMEWHERE."

"Why… how'd you even find where I lived?" Nikolai asked, getting more and more suspicious. Was he a stalker or something? Should he have actually called the cops?

"Oh, I'm your neighbour." Kristian said. "I didn't know you lived in here. Your mom asked 'are you Nikolai's friend?' and since I knew your name, I said 'yes, ma'am', and she suddenly seemed starry eyed and charmed. She's very nice. Kudos to her cookies, by the way. They taste amazing." Nikolai had just noticed the plate of gingersnap-and-chocolate-chip cookies that were placed on the table, along with a mug filled with hot chocolate and whipped cream. When was the last time HE got to eat that?

"Uh…huh." There was nothing he could say. Nothing. He couldn't think of anything. Instead, he just settled on sitting on the same couch Kristian was sitting on. Mostly because there was only one couch. And he wasn't that big of a fan to sit on the floor.

"Your mom was talking about something." Kristian brought up casually.

"Mhmm?" Nikolai said, reaching for a cookie.

"Yeah. Something about you hallucinating."

Nikolai retracted his arm sharply, as though the cookie had burned him.

"I don't hallucinate." Nikolai said defensively, his tone sharp and on edge. Kristian picked up on the harsh voice immediately and turned to appraise him, his blank expression tinged with worry.

"Then…?" Kristian said, raising an eyebrow. "I don't mean to pry, but it just seems awfully weird how she would just ship you off."

Nikolai stared at him. "Forget it. You wouldn't understand." He grumbled uncharacteristically, kicking the couch in irritation.

"Aw… you can tell me, Nikkie."

"It's NIKOLAI!" Nikolai hit Kristian with a pillow, who shouted and retaliated with his own pillow-attack. They did that for a while, ignoring the TV and the gunshots before both sides conceded into a temporary truce, the boys panting and looking at each other with suppressed amusement.

"Alright, NIKOLAI. Your secret's safe with me." Kristian said, sounding rather sarcastic. He was also trying to pat down his hair, which had fluffed up due to the contact with the pillow.

"Like hell it would be." Nikolai muttered. "But sure. See, I see things-"

"See." Kristian repeated. Nikolai looked at him.

"What?" Nikolai said.

"You said it twice." Nikolai yanked his left cheek. "OW! That hurt!" He yelped.

"Nikolaiiii! Treat your friends nicely!" His mom's sing-song voice rang out. Nikolai groaned, but Kristian looked positively pleased.

"Listen to the lady." Kristian said. Nikolai gave him a glare.

"Just shut up for a second!" Nikolai said, exasperated. Kristian immediately closed his mouth and watched him intently, eyes seemingly enraptured with his words. "I can see things that no one else can. Like faeries, trolls, nisses… I can also do summoning and stuff."

Kristian gave him one long, blank stare. Nikolai messed up his hair in irritation.

"Argh, I knew you wouldn't believe-"

"It's cool." Kristian said. Nikolai looked up, and saw Kristian's large, orchid colored eyes boring down at him. "I believe you."

"…really." Nikolai said, sounding unimpressed.

"I'm serious." His tone was… well, dead serious. "That would be an awesome skill to have. Are there any right now?"

Nikolai looked at him, unsure of what to say. He took in a breath and exhaled, feeling his nerves jangle like a stack of crackers. "There's a faerie braiding your hair." He looked at the left side of Kristian. "She's also sprinkling dust over it."

"Why would she do that?" His tone sounded curious, not at all mocking. A rare thing to happen. Even that time when he explained to Tino (the only one he had ever talked to about this), Tino had just looked at him worriedly, his smile slightly forced.

"Well. To keep it in place. Although she's unraveling it now." Nikolai said. Sure enough, the green haired faerie unraveled it in record time before Kristian could turn his head to see it.

"Mmn." Kristian said softly. "I wish I could see it."

Somehow, Nikolai could believe that Kristian actually did.

* * *

"Do you have a car?" Nikolai asked, starting up the car. It beeped, honked, sputtered, and made a decent attempt at warming up the seats. Kristian stared at the ragged leather, sitting where he had sat when he met Nikolai.

"Yeah." Kristian said. "It's a pearl-white Porsche." Nikolai raised an eyebrow. "Of course I'm just kidding." Kristian rolled his eyes. "I have a bike."

"…really."

"Yes."

"You have to pay for breaking my window, you know."

A silence enveloped the car for a bit before Kristian turned around, looking grave and overly melodramatic.

"I have a proposal for you." He said sincerely. "Why don't I just strip for you? Seriously, that'll be easier."

Nikolai didn't know whether he should cry or laugh. "…You have to be kidding."

"I'm not."

"Right… keep on telling yourself that."

"What, do you want me to? Because I could do it right now." Promptly, Kristian started to undo his ribbon and popped open his buttons, revealing flashes of creamy white skin and slightly protruding bones.

"No, you retard!" Nikolai quickly reached over and re-did the ribbon, yanking it a bit too harshly. "Holy shit! Have some _decency, _you child!"

"Nikolai?"

Nikolai turned around, and, with an inward groan, saw the devil of annoyance reincarnated- Mathias. He leaned over and smiled dazzlingly, but Nikolai knew that it was only to hide the heart of black that was contained inside his muscular body.

"Mathias." Nikolai said, his voice hard and emotionless.

"May I ask why you're harassing a lil one?" Mathias said, his eyes dancing in amusement, as though he couldn't WAIT to tell everyone. In fact, Nikolai was about 120% sure that was what Mathias was thinking right now.

"I'm not."

"Then why are you undoing his ribbon?"

"I'm REDOING it, you jackass."

"Ah- that means you two have done the deed already?" Mathias cocked his head, his grin even wider now. "Excuse me, I'm so rude. I haven't even asked what your lady friend's name is."

"I'm male." Kristian said, his tone just as flat and emotionless as Nikolai's. "And we are not having sex." Nikolai and Mathias jerked in surprise.

"Wowza! Nikolai, where did you pick up this guy?" Mathias grinned. "He sounds like you! Hey, he could be your _long-lost brother!_"

"Shut the fuck up." Nikolai said, glaring at him. "He's this guy who broke into my car-"

"WOAH! He's quite feisty, then!" Mathias said, finally seeing the broken window. He let out a low whistle, as if impressed by the damage "He must be great at se-"

"GO BUG LARS." Nikolai said, almost tempted to punch him through the window. Lars was Mathias's friend from faraway Holland who was obsessed with money and was a rich young miser. He was also _really good _at having fun at parties he wasn't hosting- mostly because he could drink all the beer he wanted without spending a dime.

"I'll go tell the good news to everyone! Nikolai finally gets laid!" Mathias called out, causing a couple of heads to swivel in his direction. "Not that you're ugly! You just have this ice princess personality, which is actually quite a big turn on for some people-"

Nikolai stepped on the gas pedal -_hard_-and it immediately lurched forward, straight in Mathias's direction. Mathias yelped and ran the other way, his long legs, toned from all those years at track, propelling him forward at an inhumane pace.

"NOT FOR ME, OF COURSE, BUT SOME PEOPLE!" Mathias yelled, always wanting to have the last word. Nikolai sighed in defeat and instead turned on the radio.

"_This song is for those with a cold personality, or, as some may call it, a beautiful ice princess! Lighten up and-"_

He smashed it with his handy-dandy pipe, left behind by Ivan a few days ago. The radio was now broken into a million plastic-red pieces.

And Kristian just munched on his cookie, as if used to it.

"I'm not paying for that." Kristian said. Nikolai turned around and snatched the cookie away from Kristian. In one angry gulp, it was gone.

"Alright." Nikolai said, sighing. "Excuse me. That was Mathias. Most annoying guy ever. Goes to my University-"

"You're in University?" Kristian said, bemused.

"Would you stop cutting my sentences short?" Nikolai said, rolling his eyes. "Yes. I do. How old did I look like?"

"My age." Kristian said.

"I'll take that as a compliment. No, I'm 21. I major in Classics. I'm well-versed in four languages, but only because my friends are from all over the place. Actually, I don't even know why they even talk to me."

"Because you look like an ice princess?" That earned him a jab on his side. "Ow. Why do you keep on hitting me?"

"Because you have a smart mouth. Now shut up, or I'm making you pay full price for the window." Nikolai mumbled, raking his bangs back.

Kristian looked at him in surprise. "I don't have to pay full price?" He said, his voice sounding a bit hopeful.

"No. You owe me lunch, though." Nikolai said, his eyes trained on the road.

"I don't have money."

"Motherfucker."

* * *

_Editing this was a pain._

_Please review if you liked it!_

_And even if you didn't, constructive criticism is always welcome!_


	2. Nothing's Sexier Than The Animal Channel

_Edit: August 01, 2013_

* * *

After Kristian pretty much pointed out every single yellow light he had ran, Nikolai turned and gave him a _look_. Most people, when confronted with his _look, _would have their words wither away and die in a pitiful little heap.

Of course, Kristian wasn't most people.

Unfortunately.

"Would you STOP being such a backseat driver?" Nikolai said, a bit pissed. "I don't need another person telling me what to do."

"I'm sitting shotgun, though." Kristian blinked innocently. Nikolai wasn't sure whether to kick him out of the car or smash his head onto his steering wheel. He settled on neither and continued talking to the other, which was one of the many mistakes he would commit in his life- including not drop-kicking the increasingly irritating pretty boy out of his car the moment he saw him.

"You know what I mean." Nikolai looked at him from the corner of his eyes, watching as the younger drummed his fingers on the dashboard. "Don't you have school or something?"

"Don't you?" Kristian challenged him, raising a silver eyebrow.

"I cancelled them today, because I was supposed to be shipped off to… some island… somewhere." Nikolai, for the love of God, could not remember the hell hole he was supposed to be in. He hadn't expected his mother to send a letter to an island for the _magically-unbalanced, _but she had also cancelled it in a flash after Kristian begged her not to do such a thing. His mother was eccentric, that was for sure.

"So it's because of me that you're still here?" The words hung in the air for a bit, and Nikolai just stared at him for a long time. Kristian shifted uncomfortably on his seat.

"Green light." He managed to say. Nikolai turned to face forward and revved up the engine once more, filling the silence with the occasional sputter of car exhaust.

"In a way." Nikolai broke the tension in the car.

"In what way?" Kristian asked, tilting his head to the side. His silver tresses caught the glow of the sunlight, making his already pale hair into an impossibly white hue. He had often contemplated just _how _Kristian had such bleached-white hair without a single drop of hairdye actually changing it for him. Genetics was an odd little thing.

"You know." Nikolai said very eloquently. He swiveled his head to face the front again, stepping on the brake pedal before nearly running into an innocent pedestrian. "Well. I… let's just listen to the radio, shall we?"

"You broke it."

"Your point?"

Kristian decided that Nikolai was a very odd child.

"By the way, I have school tomorrow. I just came and unpacked my stuff today, so…" Kristian stopped abruptly, as though a thought had entered his mind. "Why do you still live with your mom?"

Nikolai grimaced. "Your train of thought astounds me. Just how did talking about school lead to a conversation about my lifestyle?"

"Don't evade the question." Kristian retorted, getting hyped up about weaseling information out of the older one. "Now, let me know your secrets!"

"Calm down, woman, I'm getting there-"

"WOMAN?"

"I'm getting there! Okay? Anyway, school's expensive, and my apartment is close to the school, and I can't just leave my mom alone, she could barely function the last time I left her. She has a weird job to tend to, after all…" Nikolai trailed off and wished for the umpteenth time that he hadn't destroyed his radio. At the very least, country would have filled the awkward silence with guitar twanging and warbling sounds.

"A weird job…?" Kristian said, intrigued. "What kind of job?"

"Well, that's none of your business." Nikolai said snappishly, making the other turn his head over to look at him quizzically.

"Right. Sorry." Kristian kicked at the empty compartment in front of him, feeling a bit apprehensive at staying in the same area as a moody college student. The compartment opened up, only to reveal a bunch of weird animal porn books, complete with muzzles and collars and a million other things Kristian hadn't wanted to know about.

"Are these yours?" Kristian said gingerly, pointing at the offensive pile that was threatening to spill onto his lap. Nikolai followed his gaze and sighed.

"No, that's Ludwig's." He said. He didn't mention that he had asked to borrow it, in the hopes of discovering something exciting for his nonexistent sex life.

It had ended up being the sort of excitement that Nikolai was okay without having.

"The composer?" Kristian asked, looking thoroughly confused. "The famous pianist liked _kinky animal sex?_"

"NO! Ludwig's my friend's boyfriend!" Nikolai bit his lip, trying to stop the urge to laugh. Images of Beethoven started to overflow in his head, and he quickly swatted away the thoughts before he had to buy brain bleach for his scarred mind.

"Seriously? Your friend must have a tough time…" Kristian said, looking a bit sympathetic and not at all ashamed. "I mean, leashes? Mouth gags?" Kristian flipped through it and then crinkled his nose in disgust. "You know what, I'm not even going to look at it anymore." Without giving any warning, he rolled down the window threw it out the car, the pages fluttering in the wind.

"Holy- KRISTIAN! What if the people behind us think-" He didn't even get to finish his sentence. There was an angry honk, and Nikolai stepped on the gas pedal, trying to avoid the angry honking sounds of very startled drivers.

"I swear that I'll kill you someday." Nikolai said, his eyes trained on the road, completely ignoring the middle fingers that the people gave him and the words that mouthed FAGGOT.

"Of course, Nikkie, of course." Kristian waved to them as they passed by, looking completely unconcerned about the whole thing. Choruses of 'FUCK OFF' were heard and then the scandalized cars sped off into the distance. Kristian stared at the gas fumes left behind by the shiny Audi.

"I don't think they liked us very much."

"It's all your fault."

Kristian's lip quirked up slightly.

* * *

"What do you do for a living?" Kristian asked. They were sitting in the parking lot of McDonald's, sipping cokes and eating fries. Nikolai sighed. The silver-haired boy was like a overly studious child, always firing questions here and there and soaking up all the information like a sponge. He had lost count of the number of questions after #67, where he had asked how many relationships he had had and was one of the few that he had refused to respond to.

"I have different jobs." He finally said. "They change around. One time, I was a waiter at my friend's coffee shop. I was also a preschool teacher for a few months. Another-"

"PRESCHOOL TEACHER?" Kristian suddenly cut in, looking a bit incredulous. Nikolai looked at him irritably.

"Yes. Is there a problem?" Nikolai asked.

"No, no… just surprised." Kristian scrutinized him carefully. "Sure we're talking about the same person here?"

"Unless you think I'm imaginary, then no. I've been a preschool teacher. All the kids loved me, apparently."

"Apparently?"

"Well, I only heard that from some satisfied other teachers. And parents. Let's not forget parents."

"Maybe they like you because they think you're attractive?"

Nikolai paused, his fry mid-way to his mouth.

"Not that I think you're attractive." Kristian corrected himself. "I mean, it's just a fact. You know. That you're. You know. Not ugly, at the very least."

Nikolai put the fry down. "Wow. _Not ugly_. What a compliment." He finally said, thoroughly enjoying the embarrassed blush that slowly crawled up Kristian's face.

"I- oh, lord!" Kristian put his face into his hands, mussing up his hair with salt granules left over from the fries. "I'm really bad with words, so let's just pretend that the last thirty seconds didn't happen."

"Kay." Nikolai resumed eating his fries when they both looked at each other, curious lavender staring into unreadable navy, like some sort of synchronized dance move. Somehow he found himself unable to tear his eyes away, but then the other broke it off quite suddenly, looking out the window as though he was very interested in the other cars parked there.

"Well. The sky sure is blue today." Kristian said aloud.

"Oh, yes. Yes it is."

* * *

After the (extremely) awkward trip to McDonald's, they ended up at Nikolai's house again, standing around while Nikolai's mother practically fawned over Kristian, as though he was a limited edition Barbie doll. (Which, come to think of it, was a pretty good comparison, considering the fact that he had pristine white hair and had a penchant towards ribbons, if his necktie was any indication.) Nikolai's mom gushed and welcomed him in while giving Nikolai an affirmative, overly excited nod that meant nothing to the older boy. Despite Nikolai saying that they weren't hungry, she gave them buttered popcorn and ushered them into the dining table, watching them both carefully. Kristian was munching on the popcorn. Nikolai gave her a frosty stare.

"Sooooo…" She said, her eyes sparkling. "What did you two do today? Did you go roller-blading? Watch a movie? Any juicy details you want to tell mommy here?"

"Mom." Nikolai said stonily, willing himself not to jump off the stairs. "We're going to watch TV."

"Oh... alright..." She said, almost sounding disappointed. She brightened up within a millisecond, springing up and busying herself in the kitchen. "I'll bring you two some drinks, so you boys just go ahead and enjoy!"

Nikolai nodded his head slowly. "Kristian, let's go…" Kristian grabbed the bowl of popcorn, already having devoured about a half of the portion intended for the two of them. Nikolai grabbed a handful before settling down on the couch, stretching and taking up most of the space. Kristian settled for the carpeted floors, clutching a pillow to his chest while absentmindedly flicking through the channels.

"There's Mean Girls." Nikolai said suddenly, catching sight of blond Rachel McAdams. Not that he was going to admit it to anyone, but he preferred her as a brunette.

"Do you want to watch it?" Kristian asked, his finger hovering over the 'volume' buttons, as though he was going to turn the sound up louder.

"Do you?"

"Not really… kinda… yeah."

"Supernatural it is." This earned Nikolai a slap on the head by a pillow, making him almost yelp in protest. Nikolai grabbed the other pillow and smacked Kristian's head, toppling him onto Nikolai's lap.

"You're terrible!" Kristian slammed his face with his pillow again, smushing him down. At the same time, the remote was clenched tightly in Nikolai's hand. It flicked onto animal channel, and from the corner of his eye, he could see two extremely fluffy and adorable rabbits _making out_.

Suddenly, he heard stomping sounds from the other side of the room, followed by a slam of the door. "NIKOLAI! LET'S GO THE ARCADE!" Alfred ran into the dining room cheerfully, with Arthur grumbling behind him. They stopped immediately when they saw them, unceremonious gasps sneaking out from their mouths.

Nikolai was positively mortified. The pillow had slipped off, revealing his (hopefully) expressionless face. Their hair was messy, clothes misshapen, and the calm Australian voice narrating the rabbit's _mating skills _definitely wasn't helping. Kristian swallowed deeply.

"Hey."

This seemed to snap Alfred out of it. "Oh, I'm sorry…" He said, his laughter a bit forced. "I'll just..." He slowly inched out of the room, practically hiding behind Arthur, the British boy coughing and trying not to laugh at the odd predicament.

"Ah, Nikolai." Arthur said awkwardly. "I'm sorry we ran in. Please give our condolences to your… friend. And also, get a room next time. Somewhere where your mom isn't in it." Arthur gave a quick wave, followed by a look that said _you have some explaining to do, Nikolai,_ and pushed Alfred out of the way as he trekked forward. "C'mon, Alfred. I TOLD you you should've bugged someone else."

"Well, Nikolai always said no! So I thought maybe he'd say yes for once!" Alfred whined, following Arthur out of the door. "And don't push me next time! The hero should always walk out first!" There was another long silence between Kristian and Nikolai before the older boy pushed him off, making Kristian yelp in protest. Nikolai took no notice of it and changed the TV channel, his eyes fixated on the screen.

"This is the reason why," Nikolai said stonily, "that I do not know why I have friends."

* * *

_Have no idea if this chapter was good or not. I did my best to edit it!_

_Please review if you liked it. _


	3. All Princes Drive Ferraris

One of the things Kristian despised the most was being alone.

When he was alone, there were things to haunt him. It was also dark, and cold, pretty much adding salt to the wound.

The funniest thing would be that he was living alone. At the age of 18, his mom booted him out from the main house to get a dingy apartment and to 'get a life and earn money!', despite the fact that he was busy scrambling to have time to study. Never mind the fact that he was almost failing all of his courses, his mom was still adamant in thinking that the way she was teaching him was correct.

So he was glad to have found Nikolai.

There wasn't a reason why he crawled under his car. It just seemed right. Underneath a 20 year old beat up, dented, paint-chipping-away kind of car, it was like an ideal hiding spot. He had nothing against Michelle, but still… they were friends, albeit it was a kind of strained friendship. He, however, did not like it when she suddenly got influenced in wanting to dress him up in all sorts of clothes and paired with guys. (One time, she shoved him and Matthew together, and he had no idea why. Luckily, Matthew was a decent kind of fellow, so he didn't seize the chance to grope him or something.)

Afterwards, he found a silver pipe, lodged at the bottom of the car. It was like God's order or something. When you see a pipe, what do you do? You pick it up and smash a car window, of course. He just let his body do whatever. In fact, maybe it'd be better if he went deep into the red, in debt, so that his mom could just cancel the apartment idea altogether. He crawled in, and settled down onto the shotgun seat. The car didn't blare out alarms, probably thinking that no one would ever want to steal this kind of car anyway. He fastened his seatbelt, and zoned out, wondering who owned this car, what his history was like, and where he lived.

The first time he laid eyes on Nikolai, he was surprised. He had just sat down, and ignored Kristian for 2.5 seconds, enough to examine him. He had pale blond hair, clipped back. His eyes looked tired, but they were bright and blue. His skin was pale and pretty, and he seemed to glow, in this ethereal way.

Of course, he snapped out of it the moment he opened his mouth. He was mad, angry, surprised, and jumped on him. He could feel the other's weight on his.

And he kind of enjoyed it.

The brief day they spent together was rather warming, really. It made him forget about his lonely apartment, his crappy cooking, and the cold temperature, since he didn't have enough money for heating.

He also really liked the cookies.

So the next day, after he pulled on his uniform and patted his unruly hair, he was planning on walking to school, until he opened his door, and found Nikolai standing there.

"Hello, stalker." He said. Nikolai's face twitched.

"Hello, stripper." Nikolai replied. "Get in the car, we're going to your school."

At this, Kristian raised an eyebrow. "Why, exactly, should I go with you?"

"Look, my mom put me up to this. You don't want to, fine." He said, hoisting his book bag. "But I'm just saying, your school is close to my school."

"Really…" He said, sounding reluctant.

"And I know because you told my mom. So c'mon, I don't care if you don't like my car." Nikolai said, rolling his eyes. He grabbed his wrist, pulling Kristian. Kristian's eyes widened, but he didn't say anything.

"How can I show up at school with that?" Kristian eyed the car. Nikolai sighed, and waved the car keys.

"No, we're going on my mom's car. Climb on." Nikolai guided Kristian to the other side. When Kristian took in the sight, his jaw dropped.

His mom drove a white Ferrari. A freakin' white Ferrari. It practically glowed, as if lit from within.

"This… is awesome." Kristian said, running to the car excitedly. "This is just… wow." He ran his fingers over the side of the car, and then turned to look at Nikolai. "But why do you have such a crappy car?"

"I was gambling. Beat this drunk guy, and he gave me his car." He shrugged. "Should've gambled with that guy with the black Porsche…" He grumbled, and opened his side of the car, sliding in. Kristian touched the seat, breathing in the scent of leather. He turned on the radio, and it was blaring out Justin Beiber.

"I'm seriously hoping this isn't part of your CD's." Kristian remarked, glad that he couldn't feel a single bump on the road.

"No." He said stiffly. "I went to his concert and got a signed copy." They both tittered at that comment. Kristian changed the radio station, and it changed to Chris Brown.

"Didn't he get banned or something?" Kristian said.

"Er, I don't know." Nikolai stepped on the gas pedal, almost hitting a pedestrian. The guy turned around to give him an angry middle finger. Nikolai ignored him. Kristian gave him a wave.

"Hey, it's your school." Nikolai parked in front of the entrance. A couple of students gasped. One took out her cell phone and was snapping pictures. Kristian ignored all of this, and stepped out.

"Are you picking me up?" Kristian asked. Nikolai thought for a minute.

"Possibly." Nikolai had a whisper of a grin on his face. "Depends on my mood." Before Kristian could say anything, Nikolai drove off. Kristian stared at the back of the Ferrari.

"Morning, Kristian." Kristian felt a slap on his back. He looked, and it was Matthew. Matthew stared at the Ferrari as well.

"Is that your sugar daddy?" Matthew grinned widely. Kristian punched Matthew on the arm.

"No, you retard." Kristian retorted. "He's a guy whose car I broke into."

"You have classy taste." Matthew said. "By the way, did you see Michelle?"

"No, thank god for that." Kristian said, his eyes flickering back and forth, hoping not to see a blurry shadow. "She's alright, but, y'know…"

Matthew nodded. "I'm asking because she borrowed ten bucks from me. Although 'borrowed' is too nice of a term."

"Did she tackle you and plunge her hand into your pants pocket?" He said sarcastically.

"Yes."

"…oh."

* * *

Nikolai reached his school two minutes later. He parked the car, and walked out, swinging his car keys absentmindedly. The campus of his school was decent, with okay food and old textbooks. It wasn't exactly Harvard, but it would do.

"Nikolai." Nikolai turned around, and was met with Arthur. Nikolai nodded his head to acknowledge him.

"Hello, Arthur." Nikolai's eyes strayed to his eyebrows and back to his eyes. It was hard not to look at Arthur's eyebrows. They had been friends since high school, but he still couldn't help but occasionally make fun of him. One time, Elizaveta plucked his eyebrows when he was asleep. (Actually, she drugged him, but shhh.) He looked pretty handsome, with or without thick eyebrows.

Nikolai mentally slapped himself.

"New car?" Arthur was looking at the car. Nikolai turned around, and then sighed.

"No, mom's." He said monotonously.

"Nikolaiiiiii!" Nikolai's eye twitched at the sound of the voice. Sure enough, an arm wrapped around his shoulder and pulled him towards the guy he didn't want to see.

"Mathias." Nikolai said coldly. Mathias didn't notice.

"So where's your lady friend?" Mathias looked around. "Did he pass out in the car from-"

"NO." Nikolai shoved his arm off. "Kristian is in high school."

"Oh my god, YOU'RE A PEDO-" Nikolai elbowed Mathias's stomach. He clutched it, and fell dramatically.

"You finish that sentence and I'll castrate you." Nikolai threatened, and promptly turned around. "C'mon, Arthur. Class is starting."

"No, it's not." Arthur said. Nikolai slapped his arm.

"Just cooperate with me, will you?" Nikolai said, exasperated. "Or are you going to meet up with Alfred?" Arthur snorted.

"Not with that git. Fine, I'll go with you." Arthur sighed, and walked with Nikolai. Nikolai frowned for a second.

"You don't like Alfred?" Nikolai asked. Arthur pondered for a minute.

"He's annoying, loud, cheerful as fuck and doesn't know how to read the situation." Arthur said, ticking it off from his fingers. "Sort of like Feliciano, but not as tolerable."

"You seem to like his company though." Nikolai said. Arthur gave him a look.

"He's decent." Arthur grumbled. Nikolai bit back a laugh.

"ARTIEEE! NICKKKK!" They turned around, and saw Alfred, waving a McDonald's bag happily. Arthur sighed. Nikolai smiled slightly.

"It's Nikolai." Nikolai said. Alfred grinned.

"Whatever you say, Nick." Alfred turned and slung his arm over Arthur's shoulder. "Artiekins! Missed ya!"

"Shut up, you git." Arthur grumbled. There was a smattering of pink over his face.

"I gotta go, have a meeting with a teacher." Nikolai lifted his hand to wave.

"What? I thought you said-" Arthur protested. Nikolai didn't bother to turn around.

* * *

"…so." Gilbert said, twirling his fork absentmindedly. "You have a sugar daddy now."

Kristian almost spat out his mouthful of chocolate milk.

"What are you talking about?" Kristian managed to say, hitting his chest to get the milk out.

"You travel to school in style." Gilbert poked him with his fork. "And I'm quite certain that you live alone."

"Now, where'd you learn that?" Kristian said, taking a bite from his sandwich.

"Easy. Birdy and I follow you back home." Kristian stared at Matthew. Matthew coughed, and looked at Gilbert.

"Don't pull me into this." Matthew said simply.

"Anyway, where'd Michelle go?" Gilbert looked around. "I was quite certain she was following the freshmen."

"She's meeting up with this chick called Elizaveta." Matthew said. "They met over the net."

"That rhymes." Kristian said.

"That it does." Matthew said, nodding. "I feel smart."

"You're about as bad as your bro, dammit." Gilbert kicked Matthew's leg. "You two are so alike I'm surprised you weren't born as twins."

"Older by 3 years." Matthew said, sounding a tad miffed.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Gilbert brushed it off. "Anyway, that's kind of creepy, to actually meet the people in real life."

"You always meet people, Gilbert." Kristian bit into his apple. "Otherwise you're going to be dirt poor and a hobo." There was a pause. "Like me."

"You're not a hobo, you idiot." Gilbert stole a piece of Kristian's cookie. "You're just, y'know. At least you get money shipped over? Anyway, that's not the point. The point is, I mean like, if you meet them on Facebook or something, and they happen to live in your city… stalker much?"

"There are millions of people, Gilbert." Kristian said. "Or billions. Or googleplex."

"What?" Matthew blinked. Kristian waved his hand in front of him.

"Whatever. There are babies being born right now, 20,000 kids dying right now, and possibly thousands slash millions of other kids getting raped right this second." Kristian said. Matthew choked on his food. Gilbert stared at him before slowly reaching to take Kristian's cookie. Kristian slapped his hand away.

"No touchie." He growled protectively. Gilbert raised his hands in the air, as if to surrender. Matthew ran to the washroom, probably to go puke.

* * *

"You know what's great about underage kids?" Matthias said, grinning widely. "They feel great during sex."

Nikolai groaned. "Shut up, Matthias."

"I'm not kidding! Especially at 18. The right, ripe time!" Matthias spread his arms out, as if waiting for a hug. He never got one. He pouted, and then leeched onto Nikolai. Nikolai then proceeded to elbow him in the gut.

"You know what? I'm going to pick Kristian up. Go fuck off, and I'll see you tomorrow." Nikolai said coldly. Matthias grinned.

"Alright! Go pick up your sexy bitch and just leave me here! I'm fine!" Matthias yelled.

Nikolai decided to apologize to Kristian about being late instead.

* * *

**Nikolai went and beat up Matthias. Yeah.**

**Okay, long, long chapter that I finally finished writing...**

**Could you please leave a review? Because then I'd know if my writing skills are crap or what...**


	4. Happiness needs money

Omg hnghhh thank you for all the kind reviews! Love youuuuu. I'm glad you like the story, please keep on reviewing. It's how I survive in this cruel, cruel world. /wipes single tear away

And woot, apparently my writing's not crap! :D You are all much too kind, ILU~

Oh! **Send me requests! **Like umm... story ideas, people to show up, pairings, anything. (Through reviews, ahah.)

Hong Kong is Kaoru, since **TheOneComplication **asked about him xD He'll show up some more, 'for sho. And I love playing with Yong Soo, ahah. One because he's Korean. Two because he's Yong Soo. Those reasons suck I know.

Song(s) listened to: Price Tag by Jessie J Ft. B.o.B/ Shut Up by U Kiss/ Dream After Dream by AAA

* * *

"Your boobs are mine!"

Kristian barely had time to shout before he was enveloped into a hug. He turned around, about to tell the guy to shove off, until he saw Yong Soo, beaming and giving him a peace sign. "Just kidding! Hi, Kristian!"

"Hey, Yong Soo." Kristian stood there, waiting expectantly for Yong Soo to let go. He didn't. They, instead, stood in an awkward pose (at least in Kristian's eyes- obviously Yong Soo didn't give a damn), with the lyrics of Lucifer blasting out from Yong Soo's headphones.

"Yong Soo, can you let go?" Kristian said in the end. Yong Soo grinned.

"Sure!" Yong Soo dropped his hand, and looked around. "Are you walking home? Where's Kaoru?"

"Kaoru's in the art room." Kristian said. He and Kaoru had the art block with each other. They were throwing water at each other, which resulted in them getting kicked out from the art room. Kristian had finished his bowl a while ago (although it looked more like a plate, to be honest) so he didn't have to stay after school to finish. He felt no remorse for his actions.

"Well, whatever! Do you think I should wait for Kao-Hyung?" Yong Soo asked, his eyes wide.

"I dunno, what do you think?" Kristian said.

"Mo-rŭ-ge-ssŏ-yo!" Yong Soo complained. Kristian stared at him.

"You do realize I don't know what you said?" Kristian said. "Also, each time you say Korean, I feel like I'm in a K Drama."

"I said I don't know." Yong Soo said, smiling. "And I know you feel that way. I mean, everyone does." He did a mock salute, hanging from Kristian's arm. Kristian staggered slightly from the weight.

"So why are you hanging around me instead of, I don't know, Mei?" Kristian asked. Yong Soo stuck his tongue out.

"I don't wanna, that's all." Yong Soo's smile widened. "And I've heard from a certain little bird that you have a sugar daddy."

"BIRD?" Kristian said, raising an eyebrow. "Matthew or Gilbird?"

"That's classified." Yong Soo placed his finger against his lips. "So who is it?"

"First of all, he's not a sugar daddy. Second of all, I'm not gay." He said flatly.

"Well, that can be changed-"

"Shut up, Yong Soo, or else I'm not returning that signed CD of Big Bang you lent me." Yong Soo paled considerably.

"Anything but that!" Yong Soo flailed. "Alright, friend. Who?"

"My neighbor." He said. Yong Soo nodded.

"Well. I have to see him some time! Since I am your best friend." Yong Soo looked in the air for a second, and the nodded. "Yup. I'm your best friend, right?" Yong Soo suddenly said, worried.

"I suppose so." Kristian said, not bothering to correct him that they only had two classes together.

"While we're at it, when are you going to give back my GD poster?" Yong Soo complained. "And my SNSD calendar?"

"Soon, Yong Soo-Ah, soon." Kristian said. Yong Soo giggled.

"Nice! Next time, call me 'hyung'!" Yong Soo said.

"In your dreams." Kristian said, sticking his tongue out.

"Maybe!" Yong Soo replied cheerfully. Kristian blinked.

"...what?"

"Nothin'."

* * *

"Asians are dominating the world."

Nikolai raised an eyebrow at Arthur, who was currently up at the front of the classroom, stacks of papers placed neatly on top of the podium. "China itself has a population of over 1,000,000,000 people. They are immigrating to Canada and America at an increasing pace. Take, for example, the amount of Asians in our classroom. Over half of our class is Asians. Their reproduction rate is quite fast as well, and-"

Nikolai doodled on his eraser. He wrote 'YES', 'NO', 'MAYBE' and '50%'. The reason why he was sitting there, listening to Arthur's meticulous (but rather long) speech about too many Asians was because Arthur had stormed in on him punching Matthias and grabbed him by the arm.

"Nikolai. Help." Arthur said, tugging him.

"Dude, I gotta pick up Kristian." Nikolai pointed at his watch.

"It's only 2:30." Arthur said. "And I have this speech I have to say. Could you wait for me?"

"Can't you get someone..." Nikolai trailed off after seeing the pleading look in Arthur's eyes. "Alright, you douche. You owe me cake."

"Alright, thank you." Arthur smiled widely, which was a rare sight. It had seemed almost worth it.

Until, of course, right now, where Nikolai was degraded to having to entertain himself by asking his eraser questions.

"Is the red string of fate real?" Nikolai murmured. The eraser turned to 'MAYBE'. "Does gum stain your teeth?" MAYBE. "Does Old Spice work?" MAYBE. "Will winter be hot?" MAYBE.

"Make up your goddamn mind." Nikolai flicked his eraser off of his desk. It bounced off a chair and hit a guy in the balls. The guy made a small gasp. Nikolai quickly turned forward, pretending to be interested in Arthur's speech. Arthur frowned.

"Is something wrong, Joshua?" Joshua shook his head no, and glared at the eraser. Nikolai stared out the window.

This was taking longer than he expected.

* * *

This was taking longer than he expected.

Kristian looked at his watch. It was 3:30. Yong Soo had said that he was going to go find Kaoru, and Matthew had already left, speeding off in his brother's Volkswagen. Gilbert had declared he was too awesome to wait for him, and Michelle had club activities. Kristian was quite certain that her 'club activity' was squealing over the newest pictures of guys they had taken.

Then again, Nikolai had said that he would come if he felt like it. So obviously he didn't feel like it.

Ah, shit. He felt stupid.

He crouched down, and watched a row of ants carrying cheesepuffs to their headquarters. They kept on moving, never stopping. Kristian placed a rock in front of them, and they just calmly walked on top of it, not pausing or hesitating at all. He plucked a cheesepuff off from an ant. The ant didn't stop either. He placed it back on top of the ant.

This was boring.

But then again, what would he do back home?

Actually, home was too strong of a word. When he went back to his apartment. Yes. There was nothing to do back there. (He didn't count homework as one- he hated doing it anyway. He would procrastinate until the last second and work for two hours straight so that he would manage to get a C+.) And was he running low on groceries? What did he eat for breakfast? He racked his brain, but all he got was a growl from his stomach.

"Stupid stomach." He muttered, poking it. "You're not hungry. You're just whining. Like a little kid." He winced as another growl emitted.

"You hungry?" Kristian looked up, and felt a scarf brush onto his face. He blinked a couple of times. A white container was placed onto his forehead. "I have cake."

Kristian smiled widely.

* * *

"There's choux a la creme, chestnut Mont Blanc, chocolate waffle and you're not even listening." Nikolai raised an eyebrow as he saw Kristian stuffing his face with a Cookies N' Cream cupcake.

"Well, I'm hungry." Kristian said. "In my defense, it was your fault. You're late."

"I told you I'd pick you up if I felt like it!" Nikolai said, exasperated. Kristian, instead of responding, picked up a strawberry tart and took a bite. The crumbs scattered down onto his pants.

"So why were you late?" Kristian mumbled.

"My friend, Arthur- you know, that guy who walked in on us, the one with the bushy eyebrows and the sexy British accent-"

"SEXY?"

"I didn't say that, anyway-"

"Yes you did-"

"Shut up, let me continue. Anyway, he was saying some sort of speech to the class. He promised me cake, so yes. Here I am now." Nikolai spread his arms out, as if to emphasize.

"Well. You owe me my time, my hunger and my loneliness." Nikolai's lips quirked up into a smile.

"You were lonely?"

"No."

"But you just said-"

"You should get your ears checked." Kristian was about to chuck a chocolate truffle at Nikolai, but stared at it, and plopped it into his mouth instead.

"Well, I guess I'll make it up to you then." Nikolai said, getting up.

"What? Where are we going?" Nikolai smiled slightly.

"Skating rink."

* * *

"You didn't tell me you used to do hockey! You cheater!" Kristian panted, gasping for breath as he watched enviously as Nikolai skated backwards and did a quick spin. "And yet you dare make me play tag?"

"You didn't ask. Fair's fair." Nikolai said, sing songing slightly.

"It's not fair, you jerk." Kristian skated towards Nikolai and skidded to a stop.

"You're pretty good. Did you take lessons?" Nikolai asked.

"When I was little, we had a lake in the backyard. In winter we would spray water on it so it would freeze over." Kristian sighed, and leaned onto the rails.

"This is probably nosy of me, but why do you live alone?" Nikolai asked. "You're younger than me."

"Responsibility." Kristian said tonelessly. "Independence. All that shit."

"Hmm..." Nikolai realized that he had probably touched on a subject that was rather raw. So he decided to do a quick breakthrough. He leaned over and grabbed his hands.

"What...?" Before Kristian could say anything, Nikolai skated forward with a breakneck speed. Kristian attempted to match his pace, but ended up giving a manly shriek and holding on with all of his might. Whereas Nikolai was smiling slightly and looking as though he was having the time of his life, Kristian's eyes were wide open and his muscles tense. All of a sudden, Nikolai did a quick 180 and stopped, making Kristian fall down onto his knees with his hands behind his head, his face staring at an awkward spot.

"Sorry, I should've gave you a warning." Nikolai said. Kristian shook his head mutely.

"Well. Can you let go of me now? I feel like a porn star with this position." Nikolai let him go, and he wobbly stood up.

"Couple over there! Get a room!" A guy hollered, skating past them.

"Shut up! You can't even bang a girl!" Nikolai yelled.

"Way to be subtle, Nikolai." Kristian said, patting his pants down.

"Oh, shut it." Nikolai pushed Kristian down. Kristian fell down in surprise, and was met with a snicker from Nikolai. He flushed slightly.

"Don't you dare!" He elbowed Nikolai behind his knees, making him gasp and fall down. Kristian bit back a laugh.

"Fuck you, man. What happened to 'respect your elders'?" Nikolai complained, sitting down next to Kristian.

"In this case, you're more like the younger one here." Kristian teased. Nikolai poked him.

"Anyway, we should get going. You have shit to do, right?" Nikolai asked.

"Homework?" Kristian said. "Can I do it at your place?" A long silence ensued before Kristian realized what he had said. "Oh, shit, that sounded sexual. Can I do my homework at your place?"

"Well. My mom would probably be thrilled, so I don't really mind." Nikolai said. "Race you to the edge!" Kristian blinked twice, and Nikolai was already speeding away.

"Hey! Bitch!" Kristian said. He smiled to himself before shaking his head and skating.

* * *

"Are you absolutely certain that you lost the key."

Nikolai could feel Kristian's disappointed/suspicious stare boring down his back.

"Well. I probably didn't. It's probably in my pocket." Nikolai dug deep down in his jeans pocket. When all he got was a needle, he reached for the other one.

"I'm quite certain you did, Nikolai." Kristian said.

"No, I did not." Nikolai argued.

"We've been standing outside your apartment for the past 10 minutes." Kristian said.

"Your point is?" Nikolai said stiffly. Kristian shook his head.

"You're insufferable."

"You sound like Arthur." Nikolai sighed.

"And you sound like a whiny 5 year old." Kristian retorted. Nikolai glared at him. Suddenly, Nikolai's Nokia phone let out a 'ping!', indicating a text message.

_Hey, Nikkie! I have your keys, hahah. Total accident, I swear! Meet you in a few at Waffle House? -The Smexy Matthias_

It took all of his willpower not to crush his phone into pieces right then.

"Fuck this." Nikolai slid his phone into his bag. "Okay, shorty, we're going to the Waffle House."

"Shorty?" Kristian echoed. "I'm about the same height as you!"

"A few inches shorter. Anyway, get in the car." Nikolai pushed Kristian. "Faster! One, two, one, two!"

"Are you high?" Kristian said, trying not to trip over the stairs. "Why the sudden craving for fat and unhealthy shit?"

"It's called waffles, you dork. Don't chicks love waffles?" Nikolai said, rummaging through his bag for his car keys.

"Are you implying that I'm a girl?" Kristian rolled his eyes. Suddenly, he saw the numerous amount of keychains on his keys. "What's with all of these?" Nikolai looked down and curled his lips up in disgust.

"Matthias and Alfred." Nikolai revved up the engine. "They like to put on key chains to piss me off."

"Can't you take them off?" Kristian eyed the little marijuana key chain.

"I would, but it's bothersome. So I just leave it on." Nikolai said, turning on the radio.

"But there's a black stiletto heel." Kristian pointed at it. Nikolai looked down, and ripped it off.

"See? It's gone now. Woot." Nikolai turned up the volume, as though to indicate that this conversation was over.

"I don't know why I even put up with you." Kristian sighed and shook his head.

"I don't know why I put up with YOU, you twat." Nikolai ran a red light. A couple of startled cries and yelps from other drivers seemed to be ineffective against Nikolai. He flipped the middle finger and pressed the gas pedal even harder.

"Why do you even have a license?" Kristian said, clenching his seat belt tightly.

"I have connections." Nikolai said simply.

Kristian was quite certain that he did.

* * *

_"The keys are with Miss Lucy, the waitress. P.S. Can you pay for my bill? Love you!"_

Lucy, the waitress, looked all too happy to give Nikolai the bill. Nikolai gave it a once over. 20 waffles. 3 canisters of coffee, drenched in cream and sugar. 32 super-sized burgers. 5 extra-large soda floats. Rare steak.

The total came to $214.60.

"Oh, and here! Your keys." Lucy said cheerfully. Her silver bangles jingled as she handed over his house key, now looking pitiful and useless. "The two gentlemen told me to tell you that they love you."

"Oh, they love me alright." Nikolai said darkly, crumpling up the receipt. Kristian poured himself a cup of leftover coffee, took a sip, and spat it back into the cup.

"There's like 10 packs of sugar in there." He said, his face contorting into an expression of pain.

"Alfred had always liked things to be extra-sweet." Nikolai rubbed his temples. "Fuck. Here's my credit card." Nikolai growled and gave her his shiny RBC credit card. She swiped it, and then smiled widely.

"Thank you! Hope you'll come back!" Lucy chirped.

"Like hell I'm coming back." Nikolai muttered. "Oh, Kristian, we're going to stop by Matthias's house, if you don't mind."

Before Kristian even said anything, he was shoved back into the shotgun seat.

* * *

"Don't say anything, Nikolai. And don't move." Matthias said as he opened the door, poised with a baseball bat. Arthur was sipping tea in the background while Alfred was facing off Tino in Mariokart. Tino was winning by a landslide. Berwald was also lovingly (if not glaring) watching Tino while chopping up fruits.

"You. Bitch." Nikolai stalked in threateningly, his fingers curled up into fists. "You owe me."

"Yeah, I know-"

"With interest."

At this, Matthias raised his eyebrow. "Woah, back the fuck up. With INTEREST?"

"10% every second. Whoops, 3 seconds passed." Nikolai said. "This is what you get."

"Okay, okay!" Matthias threw his hands up. "All I wanted to do was to check out the lil guy next to you!"

"Lil guy?" Kristian echoed. Matthias gave him a thumbs up.

"Yep. I haven't formerly introduced myself, have I? I am Matthias, the lady killer." Matthias slicked his hair back, and then raised his hand, as if for Kristian to shake. Kristian stared at it before looking back at him. "I'm Kristian. Icelander." Matthias widened his eyes and gripped his shirt, gasping.

"AN ICELANDER." Matthias said, gaping. "I... this is the first time I've met an Icelander. I thought you were Norwegian. Like Mr. Grumpy Face over there." Matthias stuck his thumb at Nikolai.

"O...kay." Kristian said slowly. Alfred waved him over.

"Kristian, hi! Do you believe in God?" Alfred said, his eyes shining. Kristian tried to detect any signs of mocking, but the other seemed to be genuinely curious.

"No." Kristian said, walking over. "And my name's spelled with a 'K'."

"Alright! Hey, will you play Mariokart with me? Tino keeps on cheating." Alfred said, pouting.

"You just suck really bad, you git." Arthur said, his eyes never leaving his copy of 'A Murder is Announced.'

"Artie! You're so mean!" Alfred cried. "And why are you reading a chick book?"

"It's NOT a chick book!" Arthur said, his cheeks red. "It's a murder mystery by an amazing author- god, you're not even listening. Go play with your cars." Arthur sounded like a mother scolding a child.

"He's an Icelander." Matthias said in wonder.

"And Arthur's British and Alfred's American and you're Danish- we're a fucking racist rainbow." Nikolai deadpanned.

"Oh, Nikkie." Matthias swung his arm over Nikolai's shoulder. Nikolai violently shook it off. "You do not understand the joys of the simple life."

"What does being an Icelander have to do with simple life?" Nikolai echoed. "I always knew you were an idiot, but this is going too far."

"Look, old chap." Matthias said, suddenly speaking with a British accent. "Icelander's are sexy. And hot. I'd bang an Icelander chick anyday."

"What the fuck-"

"And meeting one, in fucking freezing CANADA, right here, is amazing. In fact, bang him before he leaves."

Fire could be frozen with the icy glare Nikolai was shooting at Matthias.

"FUCK! HOW COULD YOU HAVE WON?" Alfred suddenly shouted. "Y... YOU CHEATER! YOU HAD FUCKING BABY PEACH!"

"Fair's fair, you hoser." Kristian replied calmly. "Now cough up the twenty bucks you now owe me."

"I'm pretty sure you have it tucked in your burger wrappers somewhere." Arthur said, looking at the scene with mild amusement, 'A Murder is Announced' forgotten on his lap.

"Very funny." Alfred said, grumbling. He started to rummage through his burger wrappers, and as his fingers hit something, he smiled sheepishly. "Oh, hahah. What'd you know, a twenty dollar bill... in my burger wrappers."

"Keep your money in your purse, Al." Tino said, eyes glinting mockingly.

"For the last time, it's not a purse! It's a wallet! A perfectly manly, black leather wallet!" Alfred protested.

"With pink stitching that writes out 'Freedom Hero'." Tino said. Alfred flushed.

"My grandma thought it would add personality!" Alfred said defensively.

"The fact that your grandma stitched it on is quite a questionable action itself." Arthur said, pouring another cup of tea.

"Okay, seriously, dude, let's move on already. Okay? Like Nikolai bringing back a girlfriend- gasp!" Alfred said, grinning. "I mean, you've had more than a few admirers- remember Charlotte?"

"She was a stalker." Nikolai said, plopping down on the couch.

"That time with Rachel?" Alfred pressed on.

"She groped my abs."

"Maria?"

"She practically shoved her vagina onto me."

"Carol-"

"Okay, I think we get the point now. That girls are crazy, psycho bitches and that we should all turn gay." Everyone stared at Matthias. Matthias shrugged. "What, I thought we were very accepting of homosexuals. Gay pride and all that shit. Anyway, continue."

"You have abs?" Kristian said, sounding suspicious.

"I used to do hockey, you dolt." Nikolai said. "Remember? I stopped after high school."

"Now he does rhy-" Before Alfred could continue on, Nikolai shoved a burger wrapper into his mouth. As Alfred was flailing around like a dying fish, Nikolai turned to Kristian. "You heard nothing."

"Um, yeah. Okay." Kristian said.

"Oh, and to answer your question, he has a six pack." Matthias patted Nikolai's stomach. "In fact, if you knock on it, it sounds hollow because he doesn't eat. Look at his skinny arms." At that point, Matthias had decided to pinch Nikolai's arm. Nikolai very casually picked up Arthur's cup of tea and poured it over Matthias's crotch.

"OWWWWWW!" Matthias yelped, leaping up into the air. "HOT HOT HOT HOTTTTT!" He patted at his crotch urgently and ran into the washroom. They all snickered.

"Dude, dude." Alfred said, finally managing to get the burger wrapper out from his mouth. "I HAVE to tell him what sport you do now. You're a freakin' champion at it, 'yo. Nothing embarrassing about it."

"Shut up, or else I'll rip your genitals out and tie it into a bow and cook it in pig fat and give it to the unicorns to eat." Nikolai said. Alfred's mouth turned into a half smile.

"You wouldn't-"

"I will."

That shut Alfred up.

* * *

**Hahah. Hah. Hah...**

**I have no excuse for the long delay. But, well. Reviews? /flashes you a hopeful smile**

**Oh and if you're reading it right now, you have managed to miss my failed writing. Apparently it's called Icelander, not Icelandic. (Icelandic is the language. /facepalms thyself) And maybe there's more failed writing in here... /gazes at it suspiciously. I'm possibly too lazy to change it right now.**


	5. Bite me, I'm famous

Mood: Tired as fuck

Music: Noona Neomu Yeppeo (Replay) by SHINee

Food: French Croissant

It's been a long, loooonnnnggg time! It's not my laziness this time- ff . net was being a douche and was not letting me update. By the way, I feel very pressured to make sure my writing is good now. I just hope I won't disappoint you all with this chapter! I think I wrote a lot of words- much more than before. And I think it's finally starting to have a plot (?) although that can change anytime. This is really hard to figure out.

Request by **TheOneComplication **for the appearance of the lovely Baltics! Don't fear, they will come on a lot more often. They just get a quickie intro in this chapter for now. Request by **PuffinCup **for the sweet and misunderstood Ivan Braginski! If you don't want your name mentioned in the requests (for some reason, I dunno) just say it in the review. If your request hasn't been mentioned, it probably means either a) I forgot, or b) I will include the character/plot/whatever later on. (Although there's a very high chance that I just forgot, so REMIND ME!)

With love from Raika! /makes heart shape with hands

* * *

Nikolai wondered how he hadn't noticed Kristian. They were neighbours, weren't they? His mom was so anal- the first day they had arrived in the apartment, instead of unpacking their stuff like normal people, they walked around the building, stopped at every single door, and introduced themselves (more like his mom was doing all the talking while he just lifted his hand to indicate them that this was his way of saying hello.) Then again, the last time they checked the next door was about a year ago, when an elderly couple lived there instead, brewing tea and watching 'Deal or no Deal' the whole day. In fact, he could hear it every time he returned to his house, since the walls were so thin. It used to bug him so bad that he splurged all of his money on Dr. Dre headphones and a purple iPod shuffle and blasted it in his ears day and night. He never noticed the delivery truck that Kristian no doubt had used to move in, or the cardboard crates he used to pack his clothes, or the fact that he didn't hear Deal or no Deal anymore. Call him crazy, but it was as though Kristian just glided in and… stayed.

Kristian was admittedly pretty for a guy. With his tall and delicate frame, pale skin and wavy silver hair, from the back, you would've assumed that it was just a girl. But then, when you looked from the front, his large, dark purple eyes looked bored and completely unimpressed with what he was seeing, his lips pulled into a line, and his attitude completely turned you off, filled with swear words and carefully masked insults, and it stung ten times worse with his monotone voice. Nikolai sometimes felt like snapping back at him, but for some reason, didn't. If it was anyone else, he would've shot a hurtful comment, but maybe it was because he was younger- he didn't feel like doing it.

"Hey, Nikolai…" Nikolai looked up from the table, his mom gazing at him worriedly.

"Yes, mom?" He said.

"Well… it's been an hour, and the whole time, you've just been doodling on your textbook." Nikolai looked down, and sure enough, incomprehensible words were sprawled all over it. Nikolai vaguely recalled that he had a math test tomorrow and that if he didn't finish these questions he was dead.

"Oh. Right. Thanks mom." He said, erasing it slowly. His mom stared at him.

"…well. I'm going out, I'll be back in 2 hours." She said, hoisting her Louis Vuitton monogrammed bag onto her shoulder. "And if I'm any later, don't worry- I probably met Nancy or something." Nancy was his mom's shopping friend. No doubt they would meet 'by chance' and spend the whole day trying on shoes that were way out of their price range and throwing them back carelessly into the shoe box. Nikolai nodded, not really caring. "There's some milk if you're hungry!" She added in helpfully. "Bye, honey!"

"Bye." He said. When the door shut, he stopped erasing, and dropped the eraser, sighing. He badly needed something to drink-and NOT milk. He felt as though lately, the fridge only contained milk. And only one flavour as well. He'd rather drink banana milk or something. He snapped his textbook shut and stood up, checking his wallet to see if he had any money, and grabbed his apartment key. Pulling on his long black trench coat, he buttoned it up, and looped a grey and blue plaid scarf around his neck. The grocery store was close by, and so was the nearby café. He would return to his math problems later. (Probably.) As he shut the door close, he glanced to his next door neighbour. Should he invite Kristian along as well? He walked over, and as he lifted his hand to knock, he abruptly let it drop. It wasn't as though Kristian had nothing to do all day long- he probably had better things to do than buy groceries with a college student. Nikolai turned on his heel, and walked down the stairs, suddenly feeling the cold, even though it was spring.

As it turned out, Kristian didn't have anything to do. He had spent the morning making pancakes (kudos to Matthew for teaching him) and ate it. He then turned on the TV, and found that Yu-Gi-Oh was playing. And seriously, he didn't like to watch it, but there was nothing else to do, so he settled onto the couch and watched as they rode motorbikes. After a while, he suddenly realized this wasn't Yu-Gi-Oh- it was Yu-Gi-Oh 5D's. He then proceeded to laugh so hard he fell down the couch and hit his head on the table, which then made him go fish for some Advil to cure his headache. And now it was 1 pm, and he was alone, on a Saturday, watching Yu-Gi-Oh.

He suddenly realized how pitiful that had sounded.

He slowly crawled out from the blanket fort he had made on the couch, and slid open his phone. Blearily looking, there was no new texts or missed calls. He silently stuck the middle finger at everyone who didn't say hello. He rolled over and accidentally brought the blanket with him, making him sandwiched in the covers and extremely hard to get out from.

"Aish! This sucks." He groaned, and then stopped. Apparently Yong Soo was influencing him faster than he thought. "Ah! This sucks." He corrected himself. "Fucking… what to do…" He attempted to get out from his blanket but then gave up, as it was too bothersome and used up way too much stamina. (Kristian was a lazy sort of person.) He stared at his phone, the glowing screen seeming to be mocking him.

"_Hah! No new texts or missed calls, you loser!~" _It sang. Kristian narrowed his eyes.

"Fuck off." Kristian stuck his middle finger at it.

"_LOL UR TALKIN 2 UR PHONE LO2ER W/ A CAP. L!" _The phone screamed at him in text language. Kristian groaned.

"I need to get a life." He burrowed his head underneath his pillow.

* * *

The second Nikolai walked into the grocery store, he couldn't believe his eyes. Standing in the baking aisle, deep in thought while holding a bag of marshmallows, was Ivan Braginski. Ivan fucking Braginski.

"…Ivan?" Nikolai said, trying to hide his shock. Ivan looked up, his lavender eyes looking confused, and then recognition followed.

"Nikolai!" He said joyously, his accent colouring his words slightly. "It's been a while, da?"

"Yes." He said. "And you still have that habit of adding 'da', don't you?" Ivan giggled.

"Obviously." Ivan said, grinning. "Comrade, how have you been?"

"I've had better days, but it's alright." Nikolai said. Ivan smiled, and Nikolai was somehow happy that Ivan's smile still stretched from ear to ear, looking disturbing and yet quite hypnotizing at the same time. Ivan was part of his hockey team in high school. They weren't exactly close, but they were rather friendly compared to most. However, he had transferred away halfway through the year back to Russia, and they had lost contact ever since. Ivan looked taller and more built, as though he had been to the gym more than a couple of times a week. He was actually almost a head and a half taller than Nikolai, making him have to look up in order to see him. Nikolai bet that if he ran his finger across his stomach, a very obvious six pack would be there. His light blonde hair was longer, and his features were more prominent and dramatic. He got rid of the white scarf, and was wearing a black v-neck that dipped dangerously low, showing off his collarbones. His dark washed skinny jeans accentuated his long legs, and he had on a pair of sophisticated loafers. He looked polished and clean-cut, and even just his shirt probably cost more than Nikolai's whole outfit added together.

Whereas Nikolai probably looked like he shrunk in the dryer or something.

"Good, good." Ivan said cheerfully. "I've been visiting around the world."

Nikolai was taken aback. He didn't know that Ivan's family was well off- but, well, it was rather obvious now. Back then, Ivan had always looped a scarf around his neck, and they wore school uniforms. "Oh… family vacation?" Nikolai said, rather envious. He couldn't remember the last time his whole family had a trip together.

"Oh, no." He said, laughing as though it was absolutely ridiculous to think of. "For work!~"

"Work?" Nikolai said, blinking. "Oh. Are you a photographer? Writer?" Nikolai, for the love of God, could not remember what Ivan's interests were, besides hockey.

"I'm a model." He said, throwing the marshmallows back onto the aisle. Nikolai blinked once, and then twice, and then gaped.

"What!" He said. "What… how…?" He questioned. Ivan grinned.

"Well, I went back to Russia, yes?" He said. Nikolai nodded mutely. "And well, I was rather fit since I finished hockey. I was scouted, apparently. So it started in Russia… and I'm quite popular in Asia. I'm trying to spread my name around here." He shrugged. "It's rather nice to be unknown though, however. I am quite sick of seeing fans everywhere."

"So THAT'S why you look so good." Nikolai said. Ivan blinked, and then giggled.

"Why, thank you." Ivan said. "We should catch up, da? Let's go to where we always go." Nikolai was confused for a second, and then broke into a smile.

"I can't believe you remember that place." Nikolai playfully punched his arm, and then winced. His arms were rock hard. Rubbing his knuckles to relieve the pain, he mentally thought to go to the gym sometimes for body building, not just for his sport.

"Of course I do." Ivan chuckled. "I mean, I didn't have many friends back then, da? And you were somewhat of an unwilling acquaintance of mine, weren't you?"

Nikolai blinked, and looked at him as though he was crazy. "Are you an idiot?" He finally said. "I actually went around and tried to dispel the stupid rumours around you, forced you to join the hockey team, and it took you MONTHS to even say a mere hello to me. God, you retard." Nikolai grumbled, and walked a bit faster. Ivan looked surprised, and then touched.

"Aw. Thank you." He said, catching up to him in one long stride. Nikolai regrettably noticed that he took one step when he took three. Nikolai felt his masculinity fade away slightly. Although all was forgotten when he found their destination.

"The ant park!" Nikolai cried out, running towards it in childish delight. The ant park was tiny and old, filled with ruined and discarded artefacts, such as a bike wheel, old, rickety swings, and a slide that was burned. And Nikolai loved it. He jumped onto the swings and eagerly started to kick. Ivan, on the other hand, sauntered over casually, the sun glinting on his skin. Nikolai reluctantly noted that he looked as though he was walking the runway and not just some dirty road to an old park.

"I can swing higher than you!" Nikolai called out, pumping his legs up high.

"Obviously." Ivan chuckled, sitting on his swing, legs stretched out and looking totally relaxed. "You were always very competitive, Nikolai."

"And you weren't?" Nikolai said. He finally stopped swinging and let it carry him away, the wind brushing his hair back. "Last time I remember, you snapped that guy's rib cage in half when we lost."

"Oh. Well. That was a completely different matter." Ivan said, sounding embarrassed. Although, embarrassment wasn't what one would usually feel when told about this. However, Ivan was a weird one. Nikolai remembered, the first week Ivan transferred in, so many whispered rumours about him being part of a gang or coming from a mental asylum was spread all over school. Even Nikolai, who didn't participate in school gossip heard about it. But soon, Nikolai found out that Ivan was just blessed with strength and cursed with an anger management problem. (Then again, no one was perfect, so Nikolai and he bonded pretty quickly.)

"Anyway, what are you doing here?" Nikolai asked, scraping his foot against the wood chips. "Shouldn't you be at a photo shoot or something?"

"I'm actually modeling for the front cover of _Fashion Gazette_." Ivan said, sounding pleased. "My manager managed to get me a spot, despite the fact that it was quite difficult. However, the shoot isn't for another 2 hours, so I decided to go and explore."

"In the grocery store?" Nikolai said, raising an eyebrow.

"I remembered the marshmallows we used to burn in summer camp." Ivan admitted. "So I was just looking at them."

"Summer camp?" Wow, that felt like a million years ago. "I can't believe you still remember it."

"One of the best moments of my life." Ivan said, grinning his eerie smile. "I'm surprised my mother actually let me go."

"I was too." Nikolai said. "My mom was more than willing for me to go- wanted me to get a social life and all that." He shrugged. Ivan nodded eagerly.

"You sure are lucky. I wish my mom let me do that." Ivan sighed. "I had to work in McDonald's for 6 months before I could afford it."

"Didn't you quit McDonald's when you worked there for a week?" Nikolai asked, confused. Ivan coughed awkwardly.

"Um. I may or may not threatened them to give me six months pay?" Ivan said, smiling. Nikolai sighed.

"Well. The past is the past. Although I really worry about what you said…" Nikolai said, eyeing him carefully. Ivan whistled, looking away.

* * *

Kristian had finally managed to wrestle his way out from his little cave. He crawled to the washroom, and groaned at his reflection. His hair was sticking everywhere, he had dark circles underneath his eyes, and he looked sickeningly pale. He began to brush his teeth, and then as he leaned in to check if he had a pimple that had grown overnight, he dropped his toothbrush into the toilet. He looked at the toothbrush, and then opened a cabinet to grab his spare. As he began brushing his teeth again, he banged his knee against the sink, making him yelp, and his toothbrush fell into the toilet again. He stared at the toothbrush and spat the toothpaste into the sink, not bothering to get the toothbrushes out. He tried to comb his messy hair with his comb, but halfway through, it got stuck on a knot. He dragged it, tugged it, and it actually snapped in half.

"Oh my god." He said, throwing the comb into the garbage bin. "What the fuck." He slammed the washroom door open and stomped to his room, much like a child who was just denied candy. Opening his closet, he eyed it, hoping to find something that wasn't too crumpled up. He then realized he forgot to go the Laundromat, so now he was forced to wear something that he shoved into the very back of the closet, never wanting to wear it. His sisters had bought it for him, saying that he would look 'amazing' and that he 'better thank him after he banged some chicks!'. It still had the price tag attached onto it. Sighing, he yanked it off, and pulled on the silver skinny jeans, feeling tight all OVER. It was really hard to move in them as well. He grabbed an oversized black t-shirt, which had pink strings hanging down diagonally, and pulled it on. He inspected himself in the mirror, and had to admit, it didn't make him look gay. In fact, his ass and legs looked really good.

He mentally slapped himself.

He pulled on his Vans sneakers, and brought his white messenger bag with him. He actually didn't know where to go, but well… he couldn't just stay inside, could he? It was boring as fuck, and holing up like a caterpillar wasn't his idea of a good time. He shoved all of his stuff in there, figuring his should bring his homework with him as well, in case he ended up at a coffee shop or something. He locked the door, and ran down the steps, almost tripping over and landing in a pile of bird shit. He glanced around, making sure no one saw, and jumped down from the seventh step, landing on bent leg, the other stretched out, striking a pose as though he was James Bond.

"Score." He whispered. Then he got up, brushed his jeans down, and walked away, acting as though nothing had happened. Obviously, the world hated him, since Michelle popped out from nowhere, running and blocking him from walking.

"Kristian!" She said, grinning, her camera in hand. "Loving your outfit. I can see your nice, taut ass all the way from Mars. Woot!" She slapped his ass, making him jump and recoil.

"I'm going to change." He finally said. As he turned around, Michelle grabbed his shoulder blades and forced him to turn around.

"Why don't you dress like this more often? Girls would be swooning at your feet instead of just idly glancing over." She complained. Really, Kristian mulled over, Michelle was a very nice person, and pretty as well, if she wasn't so damn like a stalker. Her coffee coloured skin shone healthily, and her thick, wavy hair made a lot of girls jealous. Her eyes were bright and wide, rimmed with thick, dark lashes, and she looked great in almost everything. Today, her hair was tied back into a ponytail, little wisps hanging in front of her face, her skinny jeans hugging her barely-there curves and cropped leather jacket showing off her thin waist. She could actually have anyone she wanted… except her personality usually turned away possible boyfriends.

"Because of you." Kristian retorted. "And can I ask why you're hanging around my house? No wait," He said, looking away dramatically, "I don't even want to know."

Michelle puffed out her cheeks, and then blew her bangs out of her face. "I'm actually meeting my friend around here. I saw you striking a James Bond pose, so I snapped a quick picture." Kristian's mouth dropped.

"Okay, first- you have a FRIEND? And, second- ow, ow, ow!" Kristian winced as Michelle slapped his arm with her camera. "I take that back! Second, secooooonnnnd, delete that picture, okay?" Kristian said. Michelle pretended to think it over.

"Hmm, let me think- NO." She said, turning away. "I'll see you around." Before Kristian could say anything else, she leaped into a bush, and rustled away. Kristian blinked, and then sighed.

"Oh my god…" He said, grumbling. "Why am I even friends with her?" He walked away, towards the direction of the nearby park. After about 10 minutes, he reached there, and looked around. The mermaid water fountain was pouring out water from a golden vase, and quite a lot of coins were tossed in, as though to wish. It was a gorgeous view- however, it was broken with the sight of couples. Couples EVERYWHERE. It was as though everywhere Kristian looked, there was always someone holding hands or kissing. Whilst Kristian was standing there, unsure of what to do. Luckily, he wasn't the only one who was alone. A man, looking to be the age of 25, was stumbling around, looking around worriedly and shoving his glasses up from falling from time to time. His dark blonde hair was cut rather plainly, and his green eyes looked annoyed. He adjusted his professional looking suit, and tapped his watch (which, now that Kristian noticed it, was a gold Omega, encrusted with tiny diamonds.) He looked at his iPhone every now and then, and then made a noise of disapproval when nothing showed up. Kristian, feeling gutsy for once, walked up to him and tapped his shoulder.

"Looking for something?" He asked. The man turned around and his eyes widened in surprise.

"Well, no, not exactly, um, yes." He then laughed nervously. "I'm looking for some_one_, that's all."

"Mind if I help?" He said. The man looked even more surprised.

"Well, I guess more is more, after all." He laughed good-naturedly. "Thank you, we do need some extra help. I'm Eduard von Bock, by the way." He reached into his pocket and handed him a business card. Kristian looked at it.

"Part of _Fashion Co._'s work team?" He said, wrinkling his nose. "You're part of the fashion industry?"

"Modeling, actually." He then registered the look of scepticism in Kristian's eyes. "Okay, not me. I'm the manager."

"Oh! Well. Of course." Kristian said. Realizing how rude that sounded, he corrected himself. "Oh, I didn't mean it like that-"

"It's alright." He raised his hand, as if to silence him. "If I picked a career, I wouldn't even consider modeling. It's quite the pain." He shrugged. "I'm looking for my model, actually. He won't pick up the phone. I mean, I know it's probably quite nostalgic to be in one's hometown, but seriously! The photo shoot is in an hour and half, he needs to get his makeup done!" Eduard began to ramble on. Kristian pretended to be interested by nodding.

"Yeah, okay, mhmm… what does he look like?" Before Eduard could reply, a voice cut him off.

"Mr. Eduard!" A tall, young man, the age of 24, walked over. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, and his shoulder-length chestnut hair was tied back with a ribbon. "Did you find him yet?"

"Not yet." Eduard sighed. "I'm sorry Toris, we're going to have to postpone the photo shoot just a little longer."

"I can't stay for long, I have to take photos for a splash page on the Coco Mademoiselle Chanel perfume." Toris sighed, mussing up his hair.

"Please, just a little longer, I'll get in contact with him." Eduard pleaded, his expression serious. Toris thought for a second, and then smiled.

"Fine. Another twenty minutes. If he doesn't come today, we have to reschedule it for next week." Toris warned. "I'll get the crew to set up for it. By the way, who's he?" Toris said, motioning towards Kristian.

"Oh. This is…" Eduard looked at him, embarrassed. "Sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"I didn't even say it." Kristian rolled his eyes. "I'm Kristian."

"Kristian." Toris looked at him up and down. "He'd be pretty good photo material, actually."

"No, it's okay." Kristian shook his head. "Modelling really isn't at the top of my favourite careers."

"Your loss." Toris shrugged. "I'm quite certain that Feliks would enjoy it a lot, though."

"Feliks?" Kristian asked, confused.

"The makeup specialist. He also designs clothes." He explained. "I'm sure that he would've liked to measure you and create some new fashions for the next runway."

"Uh." Kristian wondered what he got himself into, before someone whistled. Kristian turned around, and almost looked surprised- but held it back. There, walking towards them, was a tall, exotic-looking man, talking animatedly with a much shorter but just as great in appearance, Nikolai.

"He's like sex on legs!" A woman furiously whispered to another woman. They both nodded furtively. A couple of hushed whispers spread across, and he could hear glimpses.

"- Fucking"

"OH MY GOD IT'S-"

"Quick, take a picture-"

"Nikolai?" Kristian said. Nikolai looked up, and was startled.

"…Kristian?"

* * *

Kristian and Nikolai ended up saying good bye to them, waving and promising to meet again (well, more like Nikolai). They wandered around the district, far away from the park, mostly because Kristian half-directed, half-dragged Nikolai away. They settled into a deserted picnic table, the mood thick and the tension high.

"So." Nikolai broke the silence.

"So." Kristian echoed.

"Nice pants." Nikolai commented. Kristian almost laughed.

"Liking the view?" He said. At this, Nikolai looked at him strangely.

"Well, they sure beat your usual jeans." Kristian was now unsure of what kind of response to use. So he instead changed the topic.

"So… who's that guy?" Kristian said, pointedly not using Ivan's name.

"An old hockey teammate." Nikolai said uninterestedly. "Lost contact halfway through high school, since he left. Met him in the grocery store."

"Isn't that just fantastic?" Kristian said, amused. "In the grocery store. Imagine that."

"He was looking at marshmallows."

"He looks too fit to eat marshmallows."

"Well… reminiscing about the past."

"About what? How he was before he dieted?"

Nikolai looked at him in surprise. Kristian coughed and looked away, rubbing his arms.

"No. Summer camp." Nikolai said. Kristian waited for him to elaborate, but Nikolai seemed to be suddenly very interested in a carved mark of a middle finger.

"Would you like to say some more?" Kristian said.

"Um. I'll save that for another day." Nikolai said. Truthfully, Kristian didn't really want to know it anyway, although he wasn't sure why.

"...alright."

That seemed to be a conversation stopper, since the mood became awkward all over again. Nikolai cleared his throat, making Kristian look up.

"I was actually going to invite you to come grocery shopping with me, but I thought that you were probably busy." Nikolai said. Kristian almost laughed, but held it back. Nikolai had the expression of some grade-schooler pouting over the fact that he couldn't get what he wanted.

"I wasn't busy. I was stuck in my blankets while watching Yu-Gi-Oh." Kristian said. Nikolai looked startled, and then burst out laughing.

"You retard. How'd you even do that?" Nikolai teased, kicking Kristian's knee.

"It's called skills, which you don't have." Kristian said, feigning a haughty look.

"Correction: Skills I don't WANT." Nikolai said smugly. Kristian puffed out his cheeks in irritation.

"Yeah, well, one day, you'll get stuck in a blanket as well." Nikolai shook his head, smiling slightly.

"Oh, I can't WAIT." Nikolai said sarcastically. "But if I ever do, you won't be there to witness it."

"Pfft... is that a challenge?" Kristian said, half-mockingly, half-serious.

"You bet." Nikolai's eyes glittered. "Twenty bucks says I won't."

"Thirty bucks says you will." Kristian said, upping the bargain.

"Thirty-_five _that I won't." Nikolai said.

"Thirty-five and a trip to the amusement park says you will." Kristian thought for a second. "Time limit is 6 months."

"6 months?" Nikolai said, surprised. "That's way too long."

"Are you backing out?" Kristian teased. "Then you owe me money."

"Fuck you. Fine, and shake on it!" Nikolai said, raising his hand out. Kristian clasped his hand over it, and was pleasantly surprised that his hand was soft and smooth, not rough.

"Also: you can't do it to me on purpose, it has to happen naturally." Nikolai said. Kristian stuck his tongue out.

"F-i-n-eeeeee." Kristian said, dragging it out, obviously not pleased. Nikolai couldn't resist- he started to pat Kristian's head, ruffling his hair. Kristian blinked, but didn't do anything to stop it.

"You're like this pre-schooler I had to babysit." He said. Kristian's cozy mood immediately vanished.

"And you're like the older brother I never wanted." Kristian shot back. Nikolai sighed in defeat.

"You bratty little kid." Kristian just shrugged.

"Tell me something I don't know."

* * *

Lame ending sentence is lame. But I just want to get this done and over with! Posting time

AND, AND. THIS IS 5000 WORDS WOOT. I will try to make it longer next time~

By the way, did you notice Kristian's feelings? He's getting jealous. /shot. Although you probably can't tell, since he's so chill like that. And Nikolai didn't notice.

NOTICE THE LITTLE CHALLENGE. It will be mentioned some other time~

And, Kristian's reaction to Yu-Gi-Oh 5D's? It's exactly how I felt. Yes, I modeled him after my real life experiences.

REVIEW FOR A FASTER, BETTER UPDATE?


	6. Coffee or Slush, that is the question

**Chapter Title: **Coffee or slush, that is the question

**Mood:** Satisfied/ Tired/ Bordering on happy

**Music:** I'll be there - BOYFRIEND/ How to Go - School Food Punishment (aka UN-GO's opening)

**Food:** None

**HAI GAIZ. **It's RAIKAAAAAA. Haven't heard from me in a while, lol.

Some people have asked me to update my other Nor/Ice story. I don't think I will, I bit off more than I could chew for that story LOL.

Btw, I checked out the Nor/Ice stories, and there hasn't been much new ones. I'm surprised. Since Hetalia is so popular I expected like, a million more. Hah. Ha.

Do you want me to write a few triple-shots for them or something? I have some free time now. C:

Or do I? :D

Sorry, it's a bit angsty... but I tried to balance it out with fluff. So half-angst-half-fluff-half-being-stupid. Wait, wouldn't that make it into thirds? Ah, fuck math. Oh! But it kind of has to move on, so I'm making them have more heart-to-hearts?

I'm not very patient, so I may have quickened the pace a tad too early. I'm not sure hah.

If you're wondering why Nikolai gets teased, it's cause he sees things that others don't. Kids are so harsh.

Btw this /thing/ is now over 4000 words! I haven't reached my goal of 6000 words yet. Hopefully next chapter will be longer.

* * *

Nikolai woke up to the sound of the coffee grinding and his limbs completely tangled up in his blankets.

It had been a while since he had slept so noisily, thrashing around and dreaming about his most hated things, taunting at him and prodding him with a red-hot poker, being about as subtle as a hardcore dieting celebrity. All of his wounds that seemed to have sealed had been cut open forcefully, the threads spilling out like blood. Every single beating, all of the insults people had thrown at him seemed to hurt ten times more, stinging and searing his skin. The sound of the coffee machine resembled a bulldozer tearing down a building. He felt trapped, and he had cold sweat all over. He couldn't move.

In fact, he didn't want to move. He wanted to melt into the blanket, to dissolve into particles and get scattered around the Earth, so tiny that he was barely there. He wanted to forget about the pain. He wanted... he wanted...

"Nikolai?"

Someone to talk to.

Nikolai blearily glanced up, his eyes half-glazed with sadness and glossed over with tears. Eye crap was crusting around the rim of his eyes, and all he could see was a mop. A talking, walking white mop, with bright purple dots.

"God, you look like crap." The mop knelt down beside him. "Oh! You're all tangled up!" The mop sounded pleased. "Now you have to take me to the amusement park!"

Amusement park? The words sounded so far away, as though it was part of another universe. Why would he take a mop to the amusement park? He blinked a few times, trying to bat away the tears.

"Are you crying?" The mop sounded worried, sympathetic. "Are you mad that you lost the bet? Are you okay? Is the blanket crushing your arm? Begone, blanket!" Despite the situation, Nikolai felt like laughing.

A warm finger pressed against his eyelids, brushed away the eye crap and patted his head a few times.

"Sometimes I seriously wonder who's the older one here." The mop sounded amused. Nikolai crawled out of the blanket, spider-style, and collapsed onto the floor. He rolled onto one side, surveying the mop.

The mop was Kristian. He blinked in surprise.

"Hey." He lifted his hand in a wave. "What are you doing in my house?"

"Your mom let me in." He responded, settling beside him, his legs stretched out comfortably. "She was busy making breakfast, so she told me to wake you up. It's Wednesday, don't you have school?"

"Obviously." Nikolai got up regretfully, missing the comfort of his blanket. Even though it had attempted to strangle him to death, that blanket was still a very nice blanket indeed. Plus it was warm. "I hate how it's almost winter."

"You don't like winter?" Kristian looked at him, his head on his knees.

"I do." Nikolai got up, and stretched. "Just not how there's school. And that the days are shorter."

"That does suck." Kristian mused. "After my club activity, the moon is out already."

"You have a club?" Now Nikolai was interested. Kristian seemed like the type to just be a wallflower.

"Kind of." Kristian scratched his head, looking away. His cheeks were dusted pink. "It's this thing."

"This thing." Nikolai said, unimpressed.

"Yep." Kristian changed the topic. "You have drool on the right side of your face and your hair looks like it just got electrocuted. I'll help your mom make coffee. Get dressed and drive me already!" He abruptly got up, kicked Nikolai on the side, and slammed the door shut. Nikolai clutched his side in agony, rolling around the floor. He slowly got up and glared at the door.

"That bastard...!"

What was he thinking? Why would he ever want to talk to Kristian about his past? He shook his fist in the air, a rather comical sight as he was wearing a t-shirt with a bunny on it. He realized how stupid it was to shake his fist at the door, and he hastily retreated into the washroom, attempting to look presentable.

* * *

"Um, Nikolai's mother-"

"Just call me Anniken!" She turned around, her bobbed blond hair swaying happily. The air smelled like nutella and slightly burnt coffee. "Okay, Kristy?"

"Kristy?" Kristian furrowed his eyebrows. "Um, I prefer Kristian-"

"What did you want to ask me, Kristy?" She said, completely ignoring him.

"Um, well, Ms. Anniken," He said awkwardly, not used to calling people's moms by their first name, "is there anything I can help with?"

She thought for a moment, and then brightened. "You can just sit there and look nice." She turned around, and brought out a steaming cup of coffee. "I'm quite happy that you offered, but I'm perfectly fine."

"Alright." Kristian fidgeted in his seat, wrapping his hands around the white mug. He felt instantly warmer.

He snuck a glance at Ms. Anniken while she was popping in a few pieces of bread into the toaster. She looked quite tired, but glowed in a healthy, youthful way. Even though she was probably a former shell of her when she was younger, she still looked positively happy. He wondered what job she worked at. He wondered who she was married to.

A sudden thought occurred to him. Where was Nikolai's father?

Was he even alive?

His mind swirled with the sudden increase of questions, wincing at his headache. Was it a taboo subject? Could he ask about it?

He placed his forehead against the counter top, eyes wide and thoughtful, boring a hole through the eggshell white walls. He had never heard Nikolai talk about his father before, nor had Ms. Anniken ever mentioned him. Maybe it wasn't such a horrible topic. He might as well ask about it, but... he didn't want to break the fragile bond between them. It hadn't been a long time since they were friends, and something like this could push him away...

Nikolai slid on to the table, looking proper in a zipped-up jacket. He seemed completely oblivious to Kristian's internal turmoil, and he barely even glanced towards him, as though he was used to him being there. He drummed his fingers on the white counter top, and looked instead at Kristian's coffee. His lips curved down.

"Mom, you left it on the stove for too long again." Kristian peeked at his coffee as well. It didn't look too off, in his opinion, but Ms. Anniken laughed.

"You're right, honey." She hummed, her voice pleasant. "I didn't realize." The toast popped out from the toaster, the color almost completely black.

"And you didn't notice the toast either?" Nikolai said, exasperated. "You have to be more careful, mom. Don't be so inattentive. What if I wasn't here?"

"Your dad will come back to take care of me." She said simply. Nikolai glanced at her through half-closed eyes, almost resembling a piercing gaze.

"I suppose so." He said, his tone saying anything but. "Just be careful, alright? Kristian, let's go." Kristian snapped to attention, scrambling to put on his bag.

Descending the stairs was a silent affair. So was turning on the car engine and the road to school. After about five minutes, Kristian broke the awkward atmosphere. "So... how'd you know the coffee was burnt?"

Nikolai looked surprised at the conversation starter, but replied nevertheless. "You know how I've had several jobs?"

"Uh huh?"

"Being a coffee barista was one as well. It was a while ago, but back when my family lived in Norway, I was working part-time at this tiny cafe. It was a pleasant job, I suppose. I also worked a bit at Starbucks- which, to be honest, is completely different from Norway, but it was nice anyway."

"How long did you live in Norway?"

"A few years. I don't even remember, really."

Kristian thought back to the jobs he used to do. Supermarket. Odd Jobs. The occasional volunteer experience needed to graduate. He didn't have much work experience, really.

The thought depressed him. Here was Nikolai, a man with experiences that probably rivalled the best of them, and there was also Kristian who didn't do shit besides roll around on the floor and throw clay around.

"When are you taking me to the amusement park?" He asked.

Nikolai looked amused at the sudden change in topics. His face dropped the hostile expression, and he had a small smile on his face.

"When I have time, young child." Nikolai said mockingly, mussing up his hair. Kristian swatted his hand away.

"No, but seriously."

"I'm serious."

"Huh."

"Look forward to the weekend, then." Nikolai pressed his foot on the speed pedal, smoothly switching through lanes every two seconds. It was one of Nikolai's past-time hobbies, as Kristian had learned. Pissing people off was Nikolai's secret passion. In fact, Kristian was so used to it that he as well ignored the angry shouts and car alarms. "Dress nice."

"It's a date." Kristian joked. Nikolai elbowed him, but it didn't hurt. "You better win me a bear."

"Hah! I'll do better than that. I'll get you two bears."

"You can't possibly get two bears." Kristian had tried those stupid carnival games before. He had gotten a stretchy snake as a consolation prize after twenty rounds of trying to swing the ring around the bottle.

"Then you are obviously underestimating my skills." He stopped the car, letting an old lady walk. The car behind them honked obnoxiously loudly. "Carnival games are my forte."

"I didn't think anything besides falling asleep would be your forte." Kristian tilted his head to the side. Nikolai pulled up on the sidewalk near his school.

"Then you don't know much about me." Nikolai waved him off. "Now, shoo. Don't expect me to pick you up today, I have plans."

Kristian watched as the car zoomed off, even after it disappeared and turned around the bend.

* * *

"You seem oddly quiet today." Kaoru commented, leaning against the locker beside Kristian's. "Something on your mind?"

"Nothing, really." He said, trying to spin his locker combination. "Just tired."

"Bullshit."

Kristian hated how Kaoru could see right through him.

"Well, okay." Kristian banged his lock against his locker, pissed off that it wouldn't turn. "I just realized that I'm 18, graduating very soon, and that I didn't do anything important."

"And your point is?" Kaoru lifted an eyebrow. Kristian turned around and gaped at him.

"Isn't that a big deal? Am I that useless?"

"Oh, god. All teenagers go through this phase." Kaoru said, as though he was actually 80 and he wasn't the same age as Kristian. "The depressing, I-wish-I-was-important phase."

"Hey, I didn't-"

"And what made you think about this?"

Kristian pursed his lips, not wanting to tell the truth.

"That guy that drives you to school everyday? What was his name... Nicole?"

"Nikolai." Kristian replied. "And uh. No."

"Lies."

Kristian almost smiled.

"How did you know? Am I that transparent?"

"I just know you quite well." Kaoru stared into the air, seemingly deep in thought. Kristian waited patiently for him to continue on, thinking that he had probably something philosophical to say to him, but all he said was, "Let's go out for lunch today."

"You're very helpful." Kristian hoisted his backpack higher up.

"Well, what did you expect?" Kaoru wiped his hands on his jeans. "There's nothing wrong with going through that phase. Or trying to make your relationship with an elder closer."

"Elder?" Now Kristian let out a laugh. "You make him sound like he's an old man!"

"He's in Uni." Kaoru gave him a judgemental glance. "It's only okay when you're in Uni too."

"What will be okay?" Kristian asked, clueless.

"You know."

"Um, I don't know."

Kaoru smiled inwardly, and turned around. "Well, I'm dying for a hot dog. You?"

"Hey, don't just ignore me like that!" Kristian punched his arm, and Kaoru kicked him back. They chased each other down the hall, knocking over freshmen and anyone that was in the way.

* * *

"Pedo."

"Not."

"Pedoooo."

"Shut up!" Nikolai threw his Psychology textbook at Mathias' head. To Nikolai's annoyance, he skilfully dodged it in one fluid motion, and scooped it up with one hand, barely glancing towards it.

"Chill, Nikkie." Mathias smiled widely. "Don't you need this textbook to study for the exam later?" He offered the textbook to Nikolai, a playful smirk etched across his face. Nikolai regretfully reached across the table and snatched it away, eyeing it as though a fearful disease had just been transferred into it through a wild animal- which the Danish man practically was.

"So you're babysitting this weekend? That's cool. Is his mom paying you?" Sometimes- no, all the time- Nikolai wanted to punch Mathias until he was rolling around on the floor in agony.

"He lives alone." Nikolai said monotonously, as though he didn't care. Mathias, however, seemed to appreciate the fact.

"Oh... he's much more mature than you, then." Mathias nodded almost sagely. "Since you still live with your mom."

"..." Nikolai flipped open the Psychology book, his fingers gripping tightly around the yellowed pages. He accidentally tore the page in half, and Mathias yelped, fisting his shirt dramatically.

"How could you do that!" Mathias cried out. "Now you have to pay for the book!"

"No one saw." Nikolai placed the page back, and slapped the book shut. "Least of all you. Understand?"

"Yes, teacher." Mathias grinned playfully.

Mathias was a good person- honestly. But he was so blunt and couldn't read the atmosphere. He and Alfred seemed to go hand-in-hand. At the moment, Nikolai wanted to get away from him and perhaps talk to Tino instead. He would be nicer. Probably.

"So if it's not a babysitting job... then... it's a date?" Mathias kicked Nikolai's leg good-naturedly. "W-o-w! Is asexual Nikolai finally getting interested in someone?"

"Shut up!" Nikolai hissed. "Don't say that. He's like my little brother."

"Oh, yeah." Mathias said, completely unconvinced. "But there is such a thing called... hmm, what was it again? Started with an i, a six letter word... ah, right! Incest."

Nikolai lunged across the table and wrapped his fingers around Mathias' throat, attempting to strangle him as the librarian ran over and screamed so loud that it made almost fifty students whip their head over in their direction simultaneously.

* * *

"You know, this wasn't how I pictured our first date to be like."

"Shut up, _Kristy._"

"I'll say whatever I want, _Nikkie._"

They both stared at the iced-over streets and the 'TRAIN NOT WORKING' signs that were plastered all over the poles. It was chilly and froze Kristian down to his bones, making him wish for a blanket. Nikolai, on the other hand, proceeded to re-clip his bangs, the gold bobby pins glittering in the dull sunlight. It was obvious that the amusement park would not be open for the day, causing Kristian to have a drop in his happy mood.

"Well, I suppose we can't go the amusement park. Unless your fairy friends can help us fly over?" Kristian suggested. Nikolai seriously contemplated this for a moment, before sighing.

"Sorry, they're only available on weekdays from 9 to 5." Kristian almost burst out laughing.

"What are they, office secretaries?" Kristian said in a disbelieving tone. "Wait, you actually get them to fly you over?"

"When I'm running late for school." Nikolai said matter-of-factedly. "Oh, but thanks to your daily wake-up calls, I don't rely on them anymore. Maybe they're getting pissed about it..."

"You know, I'd like to see them one day. What about that fairy that braided my hair?" Kristian asked.

"Oh, she's a really picky person." Nikolai pulled a face. "It's rare for her to have human contact, so you must've really struck her fancy. Good for you."

"Are you being sarcastic?" Kristian kicked at the ice, trying to break it. Shaved ice started to bundle up in a pile.

"Seriously, though. In fact, she only appears at 3:12 pm sharp and leaves after listening to a daily dose of my specially burned CD for her."

"She sounds very anal."

"She is."

"Wait, you burned a CD for a fairy?" Kristian said, realization finally dawning on him. If he was willing to burn CD's for annoying faeries, just how much free time did Nikolai have?

"Yep. She likes concertos and listening to Mexican music." Nikolai thought for a minute. "Which is a really odd combination."

"You mixed those two together?"

"Yep."

"Um. Okay." He gave a mighty kick, but instead of landing on the ice as he had planned to, he slipped and fell backwards. Nikolai lunged forward, but he didn't catch him. Kristian's back ended up in contact with Nikolai's knee, which, to be honest, did not feel good at all. In fact, it was pretty damn painful. Kristian slowly got up, rubbing his back.

"Thanks for nothing." Kristian muttered. "I bet that the floor would've been softer than your knee."

"What can I say? I work out." Nikolai said, almost with a smug air. Kristian's eyes widened in disbelief.

"No, you don't." Nikolai looked slightly offended.

"What makes you say I don't? Jesus. I have to be in shape for my sport, anyway."

"What sport do you do?"

Suddenly, Nikolai looked almost embarrassed- which was impossible, for Nikolai was the man of being expressionless. "Okay, it's my ex-sport."

"I thought it was hockey."

"Well, I was a very curious child. So I tried several."

"Like?"

"..." A string of incomprehensible words was all that Nikolai muttered.

Kristian blinked, and he cupped his ear. "Please repeat that, oh honourable sir."

"No. I refuse." Nikolai tapped Kristian's face with his hand, making a 'stop!' sign. "Try figuring it out yourself."

"Unfair!" Kristian whined.

"It is fair. You didn't tell me what club you were in."

Kristian suddenly became defensive. "This and that are totally different topics!"

"So?"

Kristian made a noise of frustration. Nikolai pushed Kristian, and he slipped once more, flailing around in terror. This time, however, instead of Nikolai letting him fall onto the concrete, he looped his arm around his waist and pulled him up in one smooth, fluid motion. Kristian clutched onto Nikolai's scarf and his other hand on his shirt lapel.

"There." Nikolai said, smiling sightly. "I caught you this time, didn't I?"

Kristian gulped, and for some odd reason, despite the cold air, his face felt like it was flaming. There was something... _odd _about being in such close contact with the other. It wasn't a bad feeling. Just. Weird. It was probably the first time he had gripped Nikolai... anywhere, really. They weren't exactly the touchy-feely friends, as he had just discovered. And honestly, he hadn't minded it. He had always preferred to remain in his own personal bubble from his friends. But now...

He held on a bit tighter, not wanting to let go. He could feel the soft cotton, the heat radiating from the other. It warmed his stiff fingers, and he clutched it almost protectively. His whole body felt tingly with warmth, and it felt suffocating. He had the odd urge to take off his jacket. He caught a whiff of the cologne Nikolai was wearing. Since when did he wear cologne? Kristian, finally snapping back to his senses and realizing how disturbing this may have looked to bystanders, pulled away from him quickly, patting his shirt and looking down, trying to cool his face.

"You didn't have to do that to prove a point." Kristian said, his voice sounding embarrassingly high.

"That, and I wanted you to chill out. If you don't want to tell me, it's fine." Nikolai patted his head lightly, the gesture surprisingly gentle. Kristian swatted the hand away.

"Yeah, okay. Whatever dude. Yo let's go somewhere else, alright?" He suddenly spoke like a gangster, a habit he had picked up from Yong Soo when he was nervous, and walked away with a swag. Nikolai looked at him with pure amusement, and followed him, swinging his arm around his shoulders and pulling his cheek, not listening to Kristian's protests.

* * *

Okay this is a bit short

But

I figured this was a good place to stop.

No amusement park, sadly. I was planning on adding it in but I decided not to. (Why? I don't know either.) Oh! But never fear, it will be in there! Sometime.

I figured that I should make the story move on already. It's Chapter Six! Of course there should be some sort of action lol.

There's a bit of angst in here (probably more than usual) but I wanted the story to (you guessed it) move on already. No story is incomplete without some drama. Lol.

The characters you have requested... I didn't forget about them. They will be included in the story. I have plans for them!

Also keep on requesting! Some characters will appear before others. It's all a bit random, the order.

Did you like the chapter? If you do please review... if you don't... well... tell me why? :D

Sankyuu~


	7. Hands Off, I'm Reserved

Hi guys. Do you hate me?

WELL YOU CAN'T HATE ME CAUSE I'M UPDATING HAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

To be honest this was rather short. Well, shorter than my other chapters. (Only 3000+ words, boohoo.) So sorry about that. But I figured, hey, an update is better than no update, and this chapter is fluffy and angsty enough for all of you guys, I think.

Gosh, I seriously want to drop this series, cause I'm not into Hetalia anymore, but your reviews make me feel happy yet guilty at the same time. Damn you lovely readers! /shakes fist in air

So um. I hope you enjoy this, I cut into my homework time for this chapter. I hadn't written in a while, so my skills have become kind of rusty. I should write more, right? /laughs.

* * *

Kristian had woken up that morning with dark circles under his eyes and drool stuck on his left cheek. His normally messy hair had looked as though it had just gotten electrocuted by ten thousand lightning bolts, and he looked so shitty that not even a fashion expert/ dermatologist/ plastic surgeon from Korea/ could help him fix the currently walking abomination named Kristian. He sort of wandered around his apartment for a little while, attempting to fix his hair with a wide-toothed comb. It had literally gotten stuck in his hair, and he had vainly attempted to get it out. It didn't work.

So now, not only did Kristian look like a Halloween-costume-gone-wrong, he also had a stupid, plastic, bright pink comb in his stupid, silver hair that resembled an afro. This day was getting off to a great start.

In all honesty, he could probably blame all of his problems on Nikolai. He didn't like to be too close to a person. Even in preschool, he had been isolated from the other children, playing with the wood bricks by himself. (He had stacked an impressive 47 wooden bricks on top of each other without falling.) And now, he just barely tolerated sitting beside his friends during lunch, opting instead to scoot away from them while drinking his milk carton. Although he didn't exactly hate close-contact, he just preferred not... well, touching other people. It sent gross chills up his spine, and even Yong Soo, who regularly hugged him from behind, was something that Kristian only recently had gotten used to. (The first time Yong Soo had did it freaked the shit out of Kristian. He had literally climbed up a tree and stayed there stubbornly until Kaoru had coaxed him back down with promises of food after school.)

Yet now, touching-people phobic Kristian had deemed being swept away like a princess by Nikolai was perfectly acceptable compared to sitting beside people during lunchtime.

He banged his head against his counter top, and then yelped at the pain that shot through his forehead. This day was turning from bad to worse. Sighing, he decided that, if he couldn't understand what the hell was going on with his bipolar body, he wouldn't bother thinking about it. Dwelling on the past wasn't what a man should do.

Instead, a man should be preparing for another shitty day of school.

He wandered down to his bedroom again, and checked the alarm clock. When he did, he was completely- excuse the pun- alarmed at the time.

It. Was. Nine. Thirty. Five.

He groaned. This had to be a joke. Or a glitch in the clock. He could not have missed almost all of first block. He had a test today, dammit!

Come to think of it, he didn't even study for the test.

Kristian sighed a breath of relief. At least he didn't have to worry about getting an F.

"Kristian!" The door banged open. Hurried footsteps slapped against the tiled floor. "Kristian! You in here?"

"Over here." He called out, and then realized it was a bad idea. He looked down at his XXL grade-school graduation t-shirt and bright purple track shorts. (They only had the t-shirt in that size, and it was covered with dandelions and paint.) He had seen Nikolai look like a total mess quite a few times, but since he always woke up early, Nikolai had never seen Kristian as a slob. And he was perfectly happy with that.

"Dude, it's nine-fucking- what the hell are you wearing?" Nikolai stopped short at the door, his eyes boring straight through Kristian. "What's up with your hair? IS YOUR FOREHEAD BLEEDING?"

"What?" Kristian touched his forehead, and surveyed his hands. Yep. They were sticky and slightly warm, and also a dark, crimson red. "Yeah, I guess it is."

"Who did this to you?" Nikolai demanded, settling down on one knee. He grabbed Kristian's face tightly, making his cheeks bulge out. "Tell me! I'll beat the shit out of him!" His normally ice-blue eyes looked worried and distraught. Normally Kristian would be dancing with joy for Nikolai to have emotions (he was a hypocrite, since he barely showed emotions too, but still), but all he could think about was how shitty he must look and how hard Nikolai was pressing his cheeks and how-

_Nikolai was pressing his cheeks. _The words finally sunk in.

_Nikolai was in very close contact to him and he didn't seem to mind._

Quite abruptly, he slapped away his hands, his heart pounding with anxiety. An awkward moment or two passed by. Nikolai stared at Kristian, his gaze emotionless. Kristian looked away.

"Um. No one hit me. I kind of. Banged my head on the counter top." Kristian broke the silence. Nikolai blinked a few times, before biting his lip to hold back his laughter.

"You are an idiot." He announced. "And we're both really late to school. Why didn't you call me?"

"I overslept. Didn't your mom call you?"

"She went off to work."

"Oh really? Where?"

"Around the- hey." Nikolai kicked Kristian. "It's classified."

"Ow! Don't kick the injured!" Kristian protested.

"You're the one that injured yourself, you retard." Nikolai sighed, and offered his hand to Kristian. "Come on. Let's work on your monster hair, and then wrap up that wound."

Kristian stared at his hand. It was very long and slender, the fingernails clipped short but clean, and there was a thick, silver ring wrapped around his index finger. He wondered who gave him that ring. It was a very manly looking ring, one that balanced out the delicate hand, making it look strong and reliable. Tentatively, he touched his hand, and out of nowhere Nikolai tightened his grip and pulled him up, the ring digging rather comfortably into the palm of his hand.

"Go get dressed. If you feel dizzy, whistle." Nikolai commanded. "I'll fix something up for you." Nikolai walked away, and suddenly, Kristian felt like a small, young child, watching Nikolai's tall shadow slowly disappear around the corner.

* * *

Almost magically, Nikolai had managed to make the ex-afro hair into its regular, shiny fluffy-ball self. Kristian had stared in the mirror for an impressive time of ten minutes without even moving. He yelped and ran away once Nikolai whipped out a random pipe and threatened to hit him with it.

Nikolai had also scrounged around in the closet and actually found some pretty nice outfit combinations deep inside the closet, so he was wearing it right now. He had managed to make his face look presentable and got rid of all the eye crap, so that was nice.

"So, are you driving me to school?" Kristian asked, settling down on the table. Nikolai wordlessly handed him his cup of hot green tea, and continued on checking the toast. After a few minutes of deep, intense thinking, Nikolai said, "I'm hungry."

"Did you just brush off my question?"

"And I'm not in the mood for toast."

"Hey! Are you ignoring me?"

"Go out with me." Nikolai grabbed Kristian's hand, and Kristian blinked, his mind temporarily shut down.

"Excuse me?" His voice sounded faint, and what the _hell _did Nikolai just say and- _oh my god my hand let go of my hand Nikolai_

"Will you be my partner in crime?" His face had on a smile that resembled a smirk and- _wait it's not what I think it is right it's too soon and LET GO OF MY HAND DAMMIT_

"What?" Kristian tried to wriggle out of his grip, but it was impossible. His grip was like iron.

"Jesus! You know what I mean!"

"No, no I don't."

"Fine, fine. I'll just show it to you." Without a single warning, Nikolai sprinted out of the door, a flailing, helpless Kristian trailing behind him like a rag doll. They reached a brand-new, black Lamborghini and Nikolai opened the door and pushed Kristian in. Before Kristian could react, the door was slammed shut and Nikolai had climbed to the driver's seat.

"You get it now?"

"No. Not really."

Nikolai sighed, and leaned forward. Kristian leaned back. Ice-blue eyes stared at orchid coloured ones, and Kristian was gripping the seat so tight he could swear his was going to leave such deep nail indents that no one could fix.

"Seat belt on, Captain." Nikolai said, buckling the seat belt in for Kristian. Kristian blinked in surprise, and Nikolai pressed the speed pedal. They careened out of the parking lot smoothly, the car humming with suppressed energy. Nikolai swerved in and out of lanes, and the car brought some awed looks from bystanders.

"Wait- where are we going?"

"I said I'm hungry."

"So...?"

"We're going somewhere to eat, idiot. What did you think I was talking about?"

Partner in crime. Ditching school together.

Go out with him... meant literally, going out with him.

Kristian felt like throwing himself out the window and getting a spanking new bruise to accompany his forehead.

"Hey, wait. We're skipping school? Isn't that a bit irresponsible of you, _Nikkie_?"

"Well, seeing as _somebody _woke up late, causing us both to suffer dire consequences, I prefer not to see my classmate's judgemental stares and instead let them think that I wasn't there because of some big, important reason." Nikolai drove into a parking lot.

"But you're just hungry."

"So? Hunger is a world problem. We should take care of ourselves before taking care of others." He unbuckled his seat belt, and looked pointedly at Kristian.

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"Are you getting out or what?"

"What?"

"Your seat belt. Still buckled." He pointed, as though showing a two-year old. Kristian turned a slight shade of pink, and unbuckled it.

"I was about to until you started talking." Kristian muttered. Nikolai stifled a laugh.

"Yeah, yeah."

Sometimes the Norwegian was much too cryptic for Kristian's liking.

* * *

The cute, brown-haired waitress kept fluttering around their table, always asking to refill their coffee, get some fresh flowers, and lots of do-you-want-more-muffins-or-anything-at-all, sir?

Nikolai always responded with a tense, polite smile (since he wasn't used to smiling) and Kristian just shook his head.

"So..." Kristian said, cutting his muffin in half. "When did you get a new car?"

"It's not mine."

"Oh."

Nikolai peeled his croissant. "Well, it's kind of mine. I borrowed it for a while, that's all."

Kristian decided not to ask any more about the car.

"Is the only reason you didn't want to go to school is because you'll get stared at? I don't know about you, but that's a petty reason. You're turning me into a rebel, and that's not gonna look good on my report card."

"One day off of five whole days isn't too bad." Nikolai replied. "You look as though you had seen through shit last night. Care to tell me why?"

Before Kristian scrambled through his brain for an answer, the waitress came over. This time, Kristian was pretty thankful for the interruption. She giggled slightly, her shiny brown hair bouncing up and down, like that of a shampoo commercial. "So, are you guys brothers?"

"What?" This time, Nikolai was the one that spoke. "No."

"Cousins?"

"No..."

"Oh! I see now." She snapped her fingers in the air, her face a picture of pure delight. "I see how it is."

"What?" Kristian couldn't help but ask. "What are you talking about?" He snuck a glance at her name tag, which was flashing in the sun. " ...Elizabeta."

"Well, two males, eating together, without another person or a girl in sight..." She sighed dreamily, hugging the menu in her arms. "So. You know."

"Um, no I don't know." Why was everyone so goddamn unclear? Kristian felt like a grade-schooler at a high school party- awkward and noticeable for all the wrong reasons.

"Elizabeta! Table 12!" A girl yelled. Elizabeta looked depressed.

"Aww... and I was just getting to the good part." She said under her breath.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh, you're so cute!" Elizabeta squealed, pinching Kristian's cheeks. "Have fun with your boyfriend!" She skipped away happily, her long brown hair fluttering. After a few minutes, Kristian finally realized what she had said, and he slowly sunk down in his chair, his face bright red.

"Something wrong?" Nikolai asked, eyeing his currently-red face with interest.

"Nothing." He mumbled. "Not. Well. Nothing's wrong." He slid back up, and took another sip from his coffee. "Wait. Doesn't it bother you that she just called us a couple?"

"What? She did?" Nikolai took a bite from his croissant thoughtfully. "You sure she didn't mean boyfriend, as in friends that are guys?"

"What? No one ever says that!"

"It's just a thought." Nikolai kicked his shin playfully under the table. "Chill out, man."

"Yeah. Yeah, I should chill out." Kristian sighed, his hand on his heart. Today was rather tiring, for some reason, and it was only about eleven in the morning.

"Let's hit the next place." Nikolai got up and put down a ten dollar bill and a few coins. "Come on, your highness. Your carriage is a-waiting."

"Why are you talking like that?" Kristian asked, bemused.

"Because I felt like it. Do we always need a reason for what we do?" He opened the door for Kristian. "Ladies first."

"In that case, you should go outside first then." Kristian pushed Nikolai out in front of him, and the door swung shut.

* * *

"So what are we doing here for?"

"To make up for that disastrous first date, _Kristy_."

"Yeah, but this looks like a trash dump."

"Hey!" Nikolai protested. "It's a playground!"

"An abandoned playground." Kristian said, eyeing the broken teeter-totter and the sleek ice that coated everything. "You know, I don't think you can get a girlfriend any time soon."

"You ass." Nikolai said, a bit stung. "I think this is a perfectly wonderful place."

"Yeah, a perfectly wonderful place to break a leg and get raped all at the same time."

"You'll understand the charm of it soon, I guarantee it." Nikolai pushed Kristian forward. "Come on! I'll push you on the swing!"

"No, it's fine- waah!" Kristian was literally shoved onto the swing, and Nikolai grabbed both sides of the chain and began to push. Kristian had to grip on tightly to refrain from falling. All of a sudden, Nikolai let out a burst of energy and Kristian flew high, high up in the air, so close to the grey, cloud-covered sky that he felt like he could reach for it and touch it. He swung back, the cold wind whistling in his ears, his hair being pushed back from his face, feeling the full force of everything. Kristian stared, wide-eyed, in front of him, with Nikolai pushing him. They lapsed into a comfortable silence, Kristian closing his eyes, pretending that he was just swimming through air, that nothing could stop him. It felt perfect and relaxing, and he had forgotten that he was in an abandoned playground.

After a few minutes, Nikolai settled down onto the slide, watching with a half-smile as Kristian swung himself, his eyes closed and his purple scarf dancing in the wind.

When he realized no one was pushing him, Kristian spun around, looking around the playground worriedly until he found Nikolai. Slowing down the swing, he got off and half-ran, half-walked to Nikolai, climbing up the slide. He occasionally slipped down, and tried again, finally sitting beside the blond.

"Did you have fun?"

"No."

"You liar."

"Yeah, yeah." Kristian waved him off, and Nikolai let out a small laugh- it was a quiet laugh, but completely real and charming. Kristian found himself laughing along, his own laughter soft and tinkling, something that he hadn't done in a long time.

"So why couldn't you sleep last night?" Fuck. Kristian was hoping that he would have ignored it, but Nikolai obviously had to bring it up.

"No reason."

"There is a reason."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"Yes- I mean no!" Kristian quickly corrected himself, but Nikolai pounced on it.

"See? Even your mind is unconscionably saying the truth. Follow its example a bit more."

Kristian sighed, leaning against the pole. There was no escaping from Nikolai's prying questions, his resolute stares. "No... well... um..." Kristian racked his brain to figure out a good reason that would satisfy Nikolai and wouldn't make him feel too stupid. "I'm... a... clean freak."

"You." Nikolai said, unimpressed.

"Yeah." Even to Kristian that excuse was incredibly weak.

"...so... how does this relate to you not sleeping?" Nikolai said, raising an eyebrow.

"Well... you know." Kristian replied feebly.

"No, I don't know."

"Yes you do."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"No- I mean yes!" Kristian groaned. "You know, this is like the reverse of our conversation before, except I lost to both of those conversations... am I making any sense?"

"Yes."

"No- I mean... oh, screw it." Kristian put his head into his hands, his fingers feeling incredibly stiff and cold. He blew on them, hoping to warm them up, but it was still pink and freezing.

"Whatever. Tell me when you feel like it, then. I didn't mean to make you feel all self-concious." Nikolai sighed, his breath like trailing tendrils of smoke. He pretended to smoke with his two fingers, and then watched as the slivers disappeared. "You want to go somewhere else?" Nikolai asked.

"Sure." They both slid down the slide, and Kristian winced at the cold plastic rubbing against his jeans. He decided to take a gamble, and said, rather subtly, "You know, my hands are really, really cold."

"Oh yeah?" Nikolai said, understanding the undertone of the message. "Then here." He offered his hand to Kristian.

This time, there was no hesitation or worries when Kristian gripped Nikolai's hand, and they laced their fingers together tightly.

* * *

God

This is like. This is full of gayness. Gayness of both kinds lol.

UM... I think they'll eventually, slowly, get together? Bear with me. I'm pretty slow at character development.

Review to make me feel guilty so I can type up another chapter?


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